


As I Burn

by kayla96k



Category: Carry On - Rainbow Rowell
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Implied/Referenced Torture, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-27
Updated: 2017-07-24
Packaged: 2018-09-27 08:16:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 23
Words: 39,968
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9984794
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kayla96k/pseuds/kayla96k
Summary: This is a au were Simon Snow is kidnapped at the beginning of the year instead of Baz. Simon Snow has been secretly in love with Baz for as long as he remembers and knows that in order to protect him, Simon can never tell Baz where he's been for the last few weeks. Baz Pitch isn't sure why he cares so much about Simon's disappearance but knows that Watford hasn't been the same since Simon vanished.





	1. Homecoming

Baz

A feeling of raw discomfort crawled up Baz’s back, invading his thoughts as he poured himself some tea. He gritted his teeth impatiently and tried to push the feeling down, fully aware that he had been feeling like this too often lately. Dev and Niall glanced at him curiously but chose, wisely, not to inquire about his strange behavior.  


Besides, it was not as if they didn’t already know why he was acting like this. The empty space across the dining hall was like a glaring alarm, flashing and shrieking at Baz every time he let his mind wander. Simon bloody Snow was responsible for his discomfort and he couldn’t even attack him for it. Because he wasn’t even there.  


“Any updates?” He asked shortly.  


Dev avoided his gaze.  


“Um, yes. The Mage has been tearing through all the Old Families’ homes. He claims it’s a routine check. We believe…well it seems like he’s looking for Snow.”  


Baz nodded.  


“Baz…why isn’t your father telling you this? Or…?”  


Baz heard the unasked question beneath Niall’s words. Fiona should be telling him all of this, not them. But Fiona couldn’t be reached and his father was playing dumb. It disturbed Baz to feel purposely left out of the loop. It also brought unwelcome suspicions.  


“He has his reasons,” Was all he said in response.  


Dev cleared his throat, ignoring Baz’s warning expression.  


“Do you think Snow is really just hiding? Or that maybe, you know, something finally caught up to him?”  


“Simon Snow is practically un-killable. I seriously doubt that’s the case,” Baz said.  


“Well, something has to kill him eventually right?” Niall said.  


“Exactly. Maybe he was caught off guard over the summer. He practically died at the end of last year you know,” Dev said.  


Baz stared at Dev, letting his words sink in. Baz had never considered the possibility that Snow might have been killed. It just didn’t seem possible. The Mage was, after all, searching desperately through every dark magician home across England. But, Baz realized, it could be a front to buy him time, convince the whole World of Mages that Snow was only missing while you strengthen your position, then deliver the crushing news. His stomach clenched uncomfortably. Simon Snow couldn’t die, not yet. They still had unfinished business to attend to, a year of growling and spitting to complete.  


At that moment Baz heard Bunce make a strangled noise, something only a vampire would have picked up on. The doors to the dining hall had opened and in walked Simon Snow, the Chosen One, thin and bruised up. His clothes, ragged and torn, told Baz that Snow had come directly from whatever hellhole he’d previously been at. Snow looked nowhere else except at Bunce. In a surprising gesture of physical affection, Snow gathered Bunce up in his long arms and pressed his face into her shoulder, his body shaking with a sob.  


The dining hall was completely silent as they watched Snow fall apart in his best friend’s arms. Wellbelove was watching, half out of her seat. It seemed like she wasn’t sure what her place in all of this was. Then her eyes swung to meet Baz and he snapped out of his daze.  


“Penny,” Snow whispered, “I-I’m so sorry.”  


“Where have you been?”  


“I can’t really talk about that right now.”  


Baz sneered. He didn’t need Snow to look at him to know why he couldn’t talk about where he’d been. Snow couldn’t talk about it because he knew Baz was a vampire. His superior hearing would pick up every word of Snow’s mysterious adventure. Baz stood and stormed over to where Snow stood with a controlled expression.  


“Welcome back Chosen One. We’d almost fallen apart without you here,” He snapped coldly.  


“Baz-“ Simon started.  


“I don’t care,” Baz put up a hand to cut off whatever Snow had been prepared to say, walking out of the dining hall instead.  


As he stalked off to the pitch Baz realized he felt oddly relieved. It was as if Snow returning had alleviated a pressure that had been on him since the beginning of the school year. With a frown he shook it off. Obviously he was relieved, now he could keep an eye on him without his father and aunt getting in the way.

Simon

Simon stood in his room, staring at Baz’s bed numbly. It had been too long since he’d been here. With a sigh he walked over to the window and trailed a hand idly against the frame. It wasn’t dusty like it would have been on the first day of term. Baz had already begun to clean the room religiously, even without Simon’s lazy presence.  


Nothing looked different and yet Simon could feel it, the flashing memories of a cold basement, pressing down on the normalcy of the room. He clenched his teeth and dizzily clutched the window frame, trying to ground himself in the moment.  


He knew his nightmares were going to be louder than Baz had become accustomed to by now. There was nothing Simon could do about it, but he still felt bad. He opened the window and breathed in the cool air. It was November now, cooler than it would have been in the beginning of September.  


There had been no fresh air the in the basement of Pitch Manor. Sweat rolled off of him even though he felt chilly from the air. Memories of pain and gasping breath rushed forward, clogging his mind with fear and darkness.  


Simon gasped and stumbled backward, tumbling slightly onto his bed. His breathing spiked and adrenalin pumped through him but he didn’t go off. He could feel the magical atmosphere around him but had no desire to use it. Malcolm Grimm had, in his own twisted way, taught Simon some measure of control.  


The door to their room swung open then, revealing a moody Baz in the doorway. His anger faded a bit when he noticed Simon’s obvious distress.  


“What's wrong Snow?”  


Simon shut his eyes and attempted to gain some control over himself. Baz couldn’t catch on to where Simon had been. When Fiona Pitch had let him go he’d made her a promise and he intended to keep it.  


“Nothing. I just…well, I’ve just been through a lot.”  


“That much is obvious,” Baz’s sharp gaze flickered over Simon.  


Simon looked away, knowing that he looked horrible.  


“So,” Baz said casually, “Where have you been holed up?”  


“That’s none of your business,” Simon said.  


Baz’s expression was cool, looking for all the world as if he didn’t give a damn where Simon had been, but something in his eyes told Simon a different story. Baz wanted to know, so badly that he was willing to be polite about it.  


“True, but is it really Bunce’s either?”  


Simon raised an eyebrow.  


“Who says I am going to tell her?”  


Baz paused.  


They had perfected a kind of game over the years. Baz knew that Simon had figured out he was a vampire. He knew this and ignored it completely. Simon in turn never brought it up, unless Baz made it too tempting. This was one of those moments. If Baz wanted to prove his point he would need to admit to having used his superior hearing earlier.  


“You tell her everything,” He said simply.  


Simon shrugged.  


“Maybe. But I trust her. I don’t trust you.”  


Baz smirked.  


“So that’s how we’re going to play it?”  


“I guess.”  


Baz gathered his stuff for a shower.  


“I’m going to find out where you’ve been Snow, with or without your help.”  


Then he walked into the bathroom and slammed the door.  


Simon lay back in his bed and stared at the ceiling. Baz didn’t want to know this secret, Simon was sure about it. Malcolm Grimm had kidnapped him from the train in September and kept him in Pitch Manor. Baz had just left for Watford at the time and had been none the wiser. For weeks Simon had endured torture beyond his wildest imaginings, both of the Normal and the Magical variety.  


Fiona Pitch, someone he had previously deemed detestable, had freed him. She hadn’t explained herself and Simon hadn’t expected her to. Fiona Pitch owed nobody and wasn’t afraid to remind you of that. But she had made him promise not to tell Baz, to never let him realize what had happened to him in those weeks. Simon had agreed, even though it also meant lying to the Mage, because Fiona had said the truth would put Baz in danger.  


Hopelessly Simon inhaled the steam coming from the crack under the bathroom door. It smelled of cedar and bergamot, it smelled like Baz. Even when the torture had been so bad Simon had thought he might snap, it was things like this that kept Simon where he was. Flickers of Baz’s sleeping face, his smell, and his cruel grey eyes had gotten him through the weeks of endless pain.  


This was stupid on Simon’s part; he knew this, yet he couldn’t help himself. He was in love with Baz and even if it was the most masochistic thing about him, it had been this that had kept him from drowning in the dark basement all those weeks.  


Malcolm had wanted to break him, to hand the Chosen One back to the Mage as a pile of useless debris, but he’d never managed it. He could have managed it though, if he’d only known the one weakness Simon had allowed himself. All Malcolm would have needed to do was tell Simon the truth: You’re in love with Baz Pitch and he’d burn you for even thinking you had a chance. But he hadn’t figured it out. So Simon was still able to pretend.  


Pretend Baz cared.  


Pretend they had a chance to live through this.  


Pretend that loving Baz would prove to be anything other than tragic.


	2. Night Terrors

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter came to me out of nowhere this morning so I apologize if it seems a bit weird. Hope you enjoy!

Baz

Baz woke up to the sound of yelling. Fuzzily he rubbed his eyes and sat up. Snow was thrashing wildly in his sheets and a horrible noise was tearing through his throat. For a moment Baz could only stare, frozen in place by the awfulness of whatever was happening to Snow.  


“Baz,” Snow groaned.  


Baz was on his feet and running over to him. He shook Snow awake harshly; afraid to hear whatever Snow might say next.  


“Snow!”  


His eyes flew open and Baz almost shrank back. The blue of Snow’s eyes were almost entirely swallowed by the black of his pupil. There was a wildness to his expression and for the first time Baz felt truly scared of Snow.  


“Baz?” He said.  


Baz swallowed and shook his head to shake off the fear.  


“Yeah. It’s me.”  


Snow’s eyes flickered around the room, as if he were looking for someone.  


“Was I...?”  


“You were having a nightmare, worse than usual.”  


Snow’s eyes fluttered shut.  


“I’m sorry Baz.”  


Baz stared at him, taking in his sweat drenched t-shirt and the purple hollows under his eyes.  


“What the hell happened to you Snow?”  


Snow shook his head.  


“Goodnight Baz.”  


Baz walked back to his bed and tried to fall back asleep. But with images of Snow’s thrashing flashing through his mind, he found sleep impossible. Instead he relaxed in bed and listened to Snow’s breathing. He was waiting for Snow to fall asleep but realized, after a while, that it wasn’t going to happen.  


“Snow.” Baz said.  


There was a long pause.  


“Yes?”  


“Are you sure you’re going to be all right? I mean…it seemed so bad. Like you might go off.”  


“I won’t go off,” Snow replied flatly.  


“But you have a tendency-“  


“I promise. I won’t.” Snow cut him off.  


Baz stayed quiet this time. Something awful had happened to Snow while he’d been away, Baz was sure of it. But he didn’t know what. It couldn’t have been the Humdrum. Baz had a feeling that if the Humdrum and Snow came face to face again it would end right then and there, not result in Snow’s months on end capture. No, this seemed like the work of the Old Families.  


“Snow?”  


“Yes?”  


“Was it the old families?”  


Snow stayed very quiet, like he had fallen asleep. But Baz could hear the rapid heartbeat in his chest and knew he was wide-awake. Baz hated that Snow wasn’t answering, not even growling like he might have in the past. Snow’s scent was clear; he was afraid. He didn’t need Snow to answer his question, he already knew.  


“What did they do to you?”  


Simon sat up and turned his bedside light on, glaring at Baz.  


“Why do you care?”  


Baz looked away. He didn’t need Snow knowing about his family problems. If Snow had been held captive this whole time by one of the Old Families then Baz was sure his father had known about it. Known about it and not bothered to tell Baz anything. It made his stomach flip uncomfortably to think his family might not trust him with this kind of information.  


“If something is happening on my side of things then I deserve to know Snow.”  


Snow’s eyes flashed with something Baz wasn't quick enough to catch.  


“You want me to tell you about my…time away so that you can feel included?”  


Baz felt his cheeks warm. Put that way it made Baz sound like an angry child.  


“I don’t mean it like that. I just meant that it’s important for me to stay on top of things.”  


Snow growled angrily, surprising Baz.  


“Well I don’t feel like sharing trauma stories with the person who wants to move up in the ranks of my tormenters. Sorry.”  


Baz glared mutely at Snow. He wanted to yell at him, to shake some sense out of him and find out what had happened. But he realized that Snow was right, he was being a despicable tosser for asking him about this. Whatever had happened to him had to have been awful and Baz was asking him to share this so that he could benefit from it. He knew he was the one in the wrong. But he still had his pride and he wasn’t about to ignore it for Simon Snow of all people.  


“Whatever Snow. You might think I deserve to know, considering I have to deal with your shrieking night terrors.”  


Snow shrank back, as if Baz had hit him. He watched his expression and waited to see if it would work.  


“Fine Baz.”  


Baz waited.  


“I don’t feel like going into detail. But I was interrogated. Extensively.”  


“For?”  


Snow’s eyes widened in disbelief.  


“What do you think? Information on the Mage.”  


Baz frowned.  


“It seems a bit excessive don’t you think? He’s not exactly hiding what he’s doing.”  


Baz heard Snow’s heart jump wildly.  


“Or maybe he is…?”  


Snow gritted his teeth.  


“The point is that they were at it for a long time. And I’m a stubborn person. So they used incentives.”  


Baz kept his cool expression intact.  


“Such as?”  


“Torture,” Snow replied bluntly.  


A chill ran up Baz’s spine. The way Snow said it, blandly, was so weirdly detached that it freaked Baz out. He had seen Snow angry, sad, and even happy sometimes. He had never before seen Snow numb though, not until now.  


“I gathered as much. I meant what kind of torture.”  


“Not going to talk about it.”  


“Why not?”  


Snow stared at him levelly.  


“Because you’re my enemy. Who knows how far you’d go.”  


Baz sneered in disgust.  


“You think I’d resort to torture?”  


Snow studied him for a moment and then sighed wearily.  


“No. But I think you might remind me of it if it suited you. It doesn’t take much to…bring it all back.”  


Baz held himself carefully. Snow was right. He wouldn’t stoop so low as to torture him but he might use the information when Snow was vulnerable. He felt his own heart thump unevenly and wondered why this affected him as it did. It wasn’t that strange for Snow to predict him so easily. They had been sharing a room for years. Still, the realization made his chest feel funny.  


“All right. Then I suppose we have nothing more to talk about.”  


“I guess so.”  


Baz stared at him, not able to look away and pretend to sleep just yet. Snow’s hair was out of control, curled in every direction. Wherever he’d been, he hadn’t been able to cut his hair or even brush it. His eyes seemed farther away than they had been in June. And his skin was too pale, like he’d been kept in the dark for weeks. He probably had been Baz realized grimly.  


“What are you staring at?” Snow snapped.  


“You’re just, different. That’s all.”  


Neither of them moved for a while. They just watched one another, as if what they couldn’t achieve in conversation could be achieved somehow in this. Baz watched as Snow’s cheeks reddened slowly, something in this exchange causing his emotions to flow unchecked. Then Snow ground his jaw and turned off the light abruptly.  


“Goodnight Baz. For real this time.”  


“Don’t wake me up again,” was all Baz said in response.  


He felt strange, jittery and anxious. Baz knew he was too keyed up to sleep but he still pretended to. It was the first time he and Snow had had a semi normal conversation with one another. While that itself was a shocking achievement, Baz found himself more surprised by the weird reactions he was feeling. He didn’t like feeling sympathy for Snow. It only invited trouble.  


Eventually Baz was able to nod off, listening to the even huffs of breath from across the room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I try to update every couple of days or so :) Sometimes I'm on top of things and update daily but more often than not I post every other day or every couple of days. I hope your enjoying the fic so far! Thanks for reading :)


	3. Loose Ends

Simon

Simon ate slowly, making sure to savor every bite of the food on his plate. Penny was watching him, her eyes deeply worried. Agatha was watching him as well, though her expression was one of impatience.  


“Simon,” Penny whispered, “Why are you eating like that?”  


Simon felt his anxiety spike.  


“Like what?”  


Penny pointed to his posture. He had one arm curled around his plate protectively and his other arm jutted out, his elbow ready to block anyone from taking his food. He had developed this stance years ago, when he was living in children’s homes all year long. The habit had dropped off after his first year at Watford.  


“Like someone is going to steal your food. And you normally eat so fast.”  


Simon’s shoulders sagged forward.  


“I-I can’t eat fast anymore. If I do…”  


He had been starved for periods of time at Pitch manor. Some of Baz’s cousins had taken enjoyment out of serving him heaping plates of food after long periods without any. Simon, acting on instinct, would gobble up the food as fast as possible. And then vomit, because his stomach could no longer handle that much food at once. He knew he could probably eat normally now, it had been two weeks since he’d returned to Watford. But the memories kept him from relaxing and eating as he would have liked to.  


Penny’s face morphed from sadness to rage.  


“I’ll kill them,” She said.  


“I know,” Simon muttered, “But don't. Please. Just let me handle this one.”  


Agatha was still looking at him strangely, as if waiting for him to finish his conversation. He raised an eyebrow at her and she indicated slightly with the tilt of her head that she wanted to go outside.  


“If you want to talk to him alone Agatha, all you had to do was ask,” Penny said.  


Agatha stared at her, cheeks pinking.  


“That’s not what I-I…” Agatha sputtered.  


Penny smiled indulgently and ruffled Agatha’s hair. Then she leaned down and kissed Simon on the head before leaving them alone at the dining hall table. Agatha watched Penny leave, a frown on her face, and then turned to face Simon.  


“What do you want Agatha?”  


She bit her glossed lip.  


“I just want some clarification.”  


He rubbed his eyes tiredly.  


“About?”  


“Well…are we still together?”  


Simon froze. He had broken up with Agatha last year, right before being teleported by the Humdrum along with Penny. He thought that everything had been made clear already, but apparently he’d been wrong.  


“I mean Agatha, we broke up. Remember?”  


She looked away.  


“You said you wanted a break. Not that we were broken up.”  


Simon felt exhaustion settle further in his bones. For years he had been with Agatha, been with her and felt horribly guilty about it. It wasn’t that he found her unattractive, she was beautiful and everyone knew it. It was that he’d been in love with Baz the whole time.  


“Agatha…I told you.”  


She hunched her shoulders a bit and turned her face away.  


“You’re...in love with him.”  


“Agatha I don’t blame you if you hate me forever. I was basically cheating on you. But, do you really want me back after all that? You can’t actually want this.”  


She stiffened.  


“Simon I knew we weren’t a real couple. I knew it the whole time. And no, I don’t want us to go ride off into the sunset forever. But we worked. For this.”  


She indicated to Watford vaguely with her hand.  


“We looked good together and we care about each other. If neither of us can have what we want right now then what’s the harm in just carrying on as we were?”  


Simon sighed.  


“Because I just can’t pretend anymore Agatha.”  


Her eyes were shiny with tears. Simon knew she wasn’t crying over losing him. She was crying because everything was changing, including the past. Nothing was as it had seemed and Simon was the one messing it all up. He hated himself for it but knew he couldn’t back down.  


“Are you going to keep pretending with him?” She whispered.  


“I don’t think I have much of a choice,” He said.  


Her eyes flashed angrily.  


“So I have to deal with your brutal honesty and he doesn’t? How is that fair?”  


Simon pleaded with his eyes.  


“Agatha he might kill me for it.”  


“Coward,” She spat.  


And then she was storming out, blonde hair streaking like a gold bullet. Baz was just walking into the dining hall when she bumped into him on her way out. He watched her lift her crown of golden hair and say something. Whatever she’d said made Baz frown. Then she was gone.

Baz

Baz walked towards the dining hall, his head swimming with frustration. It had been two weeks since Snow had returned and he found himself just as out of the loop as he’d been to begin with. Even with Snow’s nocturnal confession Baz was still hopelessly lost on what had truly happened to him.  


When he walked into the dining hall he felt someone slam into him. Wisps of golden hair crowded his vision for a moment and then she was lifting her face, rage pronounced in her features.  


“You’re going to kill him and you don’t even care,” Wellbelove hissed.  


With that, she pushed him out of the way harshly and stormed out. Baz looked up and locked gazes with Snow, whose expression was mildly alarmed. Wellbelove obviously had just left an argument with Snow but Baz had no idea how he fit in the whole mess. With a sigh he turned and made to follow her.  


“Wellbelove,” He said as he caught up to her, “What’s your problem?”  


She didn’t answer, she just kept walking with her eyes forward. Judging by the pink in her cheeks and her rapid heart rate Baz guessed she was furious.  


“I don’t understand what I could have possibly done.”  


“Me and Simon broke up.”  


Baz blinked in surprise. Snow and Wellbelove had been Watford’s golden couple for as long as he could remember. He couldn’t fathom why they would have broken up.  


“Just now?”  


“No. Not really. He did it at the end of last year. I just…confirmed it for certain right now.”  


“And I fit in to this how?” Baz asked.  


Wellbelove laughed.  


“Merlin, you’re thick.”  


Baz glared at her.  


“What are you talking about?”  


She gave him an expression so cold he wondered for a moment if she might actually spell him mute or maybe spit on him.  


“Stay the hell away from Simon.”  


Then she turned away from him and walked towards the Cloisters. Baz didn’t move, he just watched her storm off.  


Shaking his head in frustration he started his way back to the dining hall. He didn't understand all this drama. If Snow had a problem with him he could very well confront Baz himself instead of sending his ex-girlfriend to do it. It was giving him a headache as it was trying to track down where Snow had been holed up during his imprisonment.  


Baz decided he wasn’t going to play Wellbelove’s game. If he wanted to talk to Snow then he bloody well would. He was tired of everyone around him telling him what his place was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize if some of my chapters are shorter or longer than previous ones. I just kind of end a chapter when it feels right. I hope you all are enjoying this fic! Thanks for reading.


	4. Simon's Secrets

Penny

Penny knew she couldn’t push Simon any farther. He had already told her as much as he was comfortable sharing; it was unreasonable to expect him to tell her anything more. But she couldn’t help feeling like there was something he was purposefully holding back from her.  


They were sitting on the Great Lawn, Simon’s head resting in Penny’s lap. Agatha was there too, though she seemed unhappy with the seating arrangements. Penny knew it was probably hard for Agatha to accept the break up but she was still just the tiniest bit annoyed with how Agatha was handling it.  


“Simon I just don’t get it, what could the Grimms and Pitchs possibly want with you?”  


Simon closed his eyes.  


“Penny you know I have information on the Mage. I could tell them all sorts of things.”  


“But you didn’t.” Penny said carefully.  


Agatha stroked Simon’s arm lightly. Penny resisted the urge to roll her eyes. It wasn't like Agatha was banned from touching Simon but it just felt forced, like she was trying to go back to the way things used to be.  


“Simon how did you stop yourself from talking?”  


Simon laughed bitterly.  


“Concentrating on…other things.”  


Penny watched Agatha freeze and snatch her hand away. Ah, Penny realized, he meant thinking about Baz. Personally Penny didn’t really get it. Sure Baz was an attractive and smart guy but he was also mean and well, a vampire. But Penny had to admit that being in a room with the both of them meant choking on the tension in the air.  


“Do you think he knew?” Penny asked.  


“No,” He glanced at Penny’s face and made a frustrated noise, “And not because I’m in love with him. Fiona is the one who told me.”  


“And we’re trusting her because…?” Penny said.  


“She’s the one who let me go,” Simon said, flatly.  


Penny pursed her lips. She knew Simon was right but the image of Fiona’s smug face kept rattling around in her brain. That woman was the last person Penny would have expected to help Simon. In fact, Penny was pretty sure Fiona had tried to have Simon killed on numerous occasions. It just didn’t make any sense.  


“And she didn’t tell you why she did it?”  


Simon groaned.  


After that Simon stood, obviously done with the conversation.  


“I think I’m going to go take a nap,” He said.  


Penny studied his him. He had put on a bit of weight over the last month of being back, but he still looked too thin. His hair was in better shape thanks to Agatha’s care. But the dark circles under his eyes were the same as they’d been when he had first come back. It made Penny sick to think about what could be keeping him up so late at night.  


“Sleep well Simon,” She said.  


He gave her a small smile. Then he smoothed a hand over Agatha’s shoulder, which she endured frostily. As he left Penny turned to glare at Agatha.  


“What is your problem?”  


Agatha looked back at her evenly.  


“He’s going to break his own heart. And he won’t even let us stop him.”

Simon

Simon found that his spells were getting better. It seemed like a sick form of irony that Malcolm Grimm’s torture would finally help him gain control over his magic. He knew he should be napping but the sleep wouldn’t come.  


Lately he’d been trying not to sleep at night so he could avoid having nightmares. Not only were they terrifying but Simon also didn’t want to wake Baz up. It seemed unfair to pull him further into this whole mess.  


He couldn’t fall asleep because he felt guilty. He didn’t like lying to Penny but he couldn’t tell her the truth either. Fiona had told him everything and Simon had barely been able to believe it himself at the time. He was sure Penny’s rational mind wouldn’t want to accept what he’d been told.  


Simon closed his eyes and replayed the day in his mind. Fiona had hurried in silently, looking strangely panicked. Simon hadn’t said anything when she came in; the punishments were never worth talking out of turn. When she saw him she froze in her tracks.  


“Oh merlin, what have they done to you?”  


Simon looked at her again and realized she was horrified. He must have looked really awful if Fiona Pitch thought the sight too much to bear.  


“What do you think?” Simon spat out.  


Fiona seemed to shake off her uneasiness and quickly went about unshackling him. It was a messy process since he was bound with magic infused metal but Fiona seemed familiar with how they worked. This did not surprise Simon.  


“Why are you taking those off?” He asked.  


She glanced at his face and then went back to working on his restraints.  


“Because I’m going to bring you to Watford.”  


Simon felt dizzy with confusion.  


“Why?”  


She sighed in frustration.  


“You’re kind of pushy you know.”  


Simon felt the tug of a small smile threatening to break on his face. He controlled it though. Just because Fiona claimed to be freeing him didn’t meant he was safe. She could be planning any number of dangerous things.  


“I just don’t want to get in trouble. When they get angry things get much…worse.”  


She bit her lip.  


“Look Snow, I know I haven't given you many reasons to trust me or even like me. But I need your help. Baz…needs your help.”  


Simon’s attention sharpened.  


“Baz? Why does Baz need my help?”  


She looked at him strangely, as if he’d just done something wrong. After a few more seconds he felt his whole body released from the shackles. Without wanting to he fell forward. Fiona caught him and helped support his body by throwing his arm over her shoulder.  


“C’mon. I’ll explain the rest in the car. We gotta get you out of here unnoticed.”  


They quietly scurried through Pitch Manor, freezing whenever they heard so much as a squeak in the floorboards. Eventually they made it outside and Simon slid into the passenger seat.  


“Okay, now will you tell me?”  


She sighed as she pulled out of the driveway and raced away.  


“I’m going to tell you. But I’m warning you that you probably won’t believe me. You think your precious Mage can do no wrong.”  


Simon frowned.  


“I do not think that.”  


She laughed bitterly.  


“You so do. But whatever, this is too important to ignore.”  


Simon waited patiently.  


“Okay, so…my sister visited me last night.”  


Simon bit his lip, suddenly feeling uncomfortable.  


“But isn’t she…dead?”  


Fiona rolled her eyes.  


“Of course you wouldn’t know. You can be such a Normal sometimes.”  


“Except when I’m not.” Simon said grimly, recalling all the times he’d went off in the past.  


She glanced at him, her expression a fraction softer.  


“Except when you’re not.” She conceded.  


There was a short pause.  


“Anyways, yes she’s dead. But this was when the Visitings were happening. They happen every twenty years. The dead can cross the veil and talk to the living during that time.”  


“Oh.” Simon said.  


“So,” Fiona continued, “She came to me and told me it was urgent. Natasha said that I needed to find her killer and when I told her the Humdrum was not easy to track she told me…well, she told me it wasn’t the Humdrum who killed her.”  


“But it was him.”  


Fiona shook her head.  


“I thought so too but she kept insisting it wasn’t. I’m not sure why she couldn’t come right out and tell me who it was but she told me to find Nicodemus for more information.”  


“And do you know this Nicodemus?”  


For some reason she blushed.  


“Um, yeah. He’s a vampire. And the goat herder’s brother.”  


“Isn’t Ebb’s brother dead though?”  


She smiled in spite of herself.  


“Well, he’s undead.”  


This time it was Simon who rolled his eyes.  


“Okay, okay. So yeah I knew him and I asked him about it. He wouldn’t give anything away until I really pressured him.”  


Simon was not sure if he wanted to know just how she had pressured him.  


“Eventually he let it slip that someone had set up the vampire attack. Offered him power and money if he led it. Of course, he turned it down because of Ebb.”  


Simon thought about how much Ebb cried over her brother. He supposed it made sense that her brother would feel the same, undead or not.  


“Okay so who set it up?”  


Fiona blew out her breath in a hiss.  


“Davy. You know him as the Mage.”  


Simon opened his mouth and then closed it. He wanted to tell her how ridiculous she sounded but knew that would only prove her assumptions about him to be true.  


“So did you investigate it further?”  


She looked at him in surprise.  


“Um, yeah a little. I confirmed that the Humdrum hadn’t really turned up at that point. I mean for a while after Natasha died we just thought it had been a random attack, so that part made sense.”  


“And the Mage?” Simon asked.  


“Well…Nico had too many details. Knew too much about the plan. It was obvious that he’d been offered the job. Plus he would have been out of his mind to accuse the Mage of doing that if he’d been lying. He could die for telling me what he knew.”  


Simon tried to suppress the irrational part of his brain that was screaming that the Mage would never do anything like that. Because, truth be told, Simon didn’t actually know the Mage all that well.  


“Simon…if it helps, the Mage didn’t plan on killing Natasha outright, he just didn’t care who got hurt. His only goal was power.”  


Simon froze.  


Fiona tensed but didn’t speak.  


“He’s the reason that Baz has to hide who he is everyday.” Simon growled.  


Fiona studied him in her rearview mirror.  


“Simon, why do you care?”  


He locked gazes with her and held it.  


“You really don't know?”  


Her eyes widened.  


“So you care about him?”  


Simon laughed without humor.  


“Care about him? I’m in love with him. How fucked up is that?”  


Her expression became hopeful.  


“Then I can trust you’ll do what I ask you to do.”  


Simon looked out his window instead of answering. He knew Fiona was about to ask him to do something difficult, something that went against his own beliefs. He also knew that if it meant he could protect Baz that he would do it without hesitation.  


“Yes, you can.”  


She blew out her breath in relief.  


“Okay, I need you to promise me that you’ll never tell Baz where you’ve been these last few weeks or about this conversation.”  


“Why?”  


“Because Natasha told me that Davy is going after Baz next.”  


Simon gripped the car handle tightly.  


“Simon, I know this is hard to hear but Baz is in a lot of danger. And he’s honorable even if he pretends otherwise. He likes to think he could be as cruel as all the Old Families but he’s really not.”  


“So?”  


“So if he finds out it was his own father who kidnapped and tortured the Mage’s Heir it might damage him, make him vulnerable. And then the Mage will swoop in and get rid of him.”  


“What does the Mage even want with him?”  


Fiona gritted her teeth.  


“He seems to be under the impression that Natasha visited Baz and not me. He’s worried that Baz will figure everything out.”  


Simon felt panic rise up in his stomach. If the Mage wanted Baz dead then he was bound to succeed. He had so much power and Baz came from one of the most tarnished families in the eyes of the Mage’s supporters.  


“I’ll need to find a way to protect Baz without him noticing.”  


“Yes.”  


“And I’ll need to stop the Mage.”  


She nodded grimly.  


“Simon?”  


“Yes?”  


“There’s more.”  


Simon came back to the present in a rush. There had been more but he didn’t want to think about it in that moment. He could barely handle that the Mage had done something this horrible and that Baz was in danger; he didn’t want to think about all the other complications on top of everything else. Simon sighed and looked out the window.  


It had somehow come down to this. He was forced to choose between the only father figure he had ever known and the man he loved. The horrible part was that he’d already made his choice the moment Fiona had freed him. Simon chose Baz and he knew that he would continue to choose him even if it meant getting killed in the process.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize for how late I was on updating this fic. School got a little out of hand and I just haven't had the energy. I should be more on top of it from here on out. Hope you enjoy! And thank you for keeping up with my work.


	5. Warnings

Baz

Being summoned to see the Mage was not a very strange thing for Baz. He’d been called in loads of times after his pranks on Snow had been discovered. But he hadn’t done anything lately; he’d been too focused on trying to figure out who had tortured Snow.  


He took his time walking to the Mage’s quarters. After being pulled out of Greek class he was in no rush to make it back before class ended. He wasn’t sure where Snow was today. They shared half of their classes together and Snow hadn’t shown up to any of them so far today. In fact, he’d been skipping class a lot. Baz felt uneasy about it, like Snow might be planning a move against the Old Families separate from the Mage. He should probably make time to follow him and check up on what he was doing.  


The office still recognized his ability to enter, a detail that always made Baz’s chest feel a little heavy. Shaking it off, he walked further into the office until he stood in front of the Mage’s desk. The Mage was standing by the window that looked out onto the Great Lawn. He had no idea why The Mage desired to dress like an oversized Peter Pan but he certainly seemed to like it, given how much he sported the look. He turned after Baz cleared his throat.  


“You wanted to see me, sir?”  


The sir tacked onto the end was forced and Baz could tell the Mage knew it. He wondered if the Mage had expected anything different from him. They’d never seen eye to eye and Baz had never been one to keep his distaste quiet.  


“Yes,” The Mage cleared his throat, “Take a seat Baz.”  


Baz sat facing the Mage’s desk. He felt a flicker of irritation when the Mage didn’t follow suit and remained standing. This was definitely an intimidation tactic but Baz was determined to ignore it. He sat up straighter and raised an eyebrow at the Mage to prompt him to talk.  


“Well Basilton, I just wondered how you were doing.”  


Baz frowned.  


“I’m sorry?”  


The Mage’s expression was completely flat. Baz couldn’t see how the Mage could be interested in the slightest in regards to how he felt.  


“Well, with the Visitings and all, I figured you might be going through a difficult time.”  


Baz narrowed his eyes. The Visitings hadn’t affected him at all but it was obvious that the Mage believed it could have. His defenses went immediately up. For some reason the Mage was fishing for information, Baz just wasn’t sure of what kind.  


“I’m not really sure if that’s your business,” Baz replied carefully.  


The Mage studied his face. He frowned slightly and scratched at his mustache, his expression thoughtful.  


“It would be troubling for me, if my mother came from the grave to talk to me.”  


Baz tried to control his facial expression. Internally, a million questions burst into his mind. It seemed strange, now that the Mage had brought it up, that his mother hadn’t come to visit him. For some reason he’d never thought of the possibility of her coming to see him during the Visitings. Now though, it seemed like an obvious expectation. Why hadn’t she come? He felt his stomach drop as he realized one possible reason why. Maybe she could only find the living and Baz was, well, undead at best. Maybe she had found him and was too disgusted with what she saw to reveal herself to him. A shudder ran up his body as that last possibility ran through his mind. Quickly, he attempted to gain some control over himself.  


“If my mother had come to visit me, and I’m not saying she did, why would I talk to you about it?”  


The Mage shrugged.  


“It’s my responsibility to keep an eye on the students. I felt that seeing her might have been especially traumatic for you.”  


Baz sat back in his chair and crossed his arms.  


“I know you're lying,” Baz said.  


The Mage’s eyes narrowed slightly.  


“Do you?”  


Baz wasn’t sure why but he felt like he’d stepped into something dangerous. The Mage was watching him in a way he’d never done before. For the most part he’d always left Baz to do as he pleased, so long as he played the part of a normal Watford student. Now, though, he was watching him with a kind of predatory gaze. Baz didn’t want to feel scared but he couldn’t help the pulse of adrenalin that the Mage’s gaze caused in him.  


“You don't care about me at all, let alone my feelings.”  


The Mage took one step forward, placing himself closer to Baz.  


“Oh, I don’t know about that Basilton. I think you underestimate your worth in my eyes.”  


Baz was about to snap back at him when the doors to the Mage’s office swung open. Baz turned to lash out at the intruder but stopped when he saw that it was Snow. He watched as Snow stormed into the room, his face wiped clean of emotion. The Mage smiled at him genuinely.  


“Simon! How nice to see you. I’ve sent you quite a few birds, I had hoped to see you sooner but I’m certainly happy to see you now.”  


Baz watched in confusion as Snow clenched his jaw and looked away from the Mage. Nobody else was as attuned to Snow’s behavior as Baz was, except for maybe Penny. Although it wouldn’t be obvious to the Mage, it was clear to Baz that Snow was furious. He was doing a pretty good job of masking it but Baz wasn’t sure how long he’d be able to keep it in.  


“I’m sorry sir, I’ve had a lot of school work to catch up on since I’ve been away.”  


The Mage’s eyes softened. He reached out a hand to rub Snow’s shoulder comfortingly. Snow weathered the contact, even though he looked like he might go off at any second.  


“Of course Simon, I should’ve known better.”  


Snow nodded and took a step backward.  


“I came to get Baz. The Minotaur said he needed to see him after class, something about an assignment he refused to let Baz slide on.”  


Baz groaned internally. The Minotaur was more than aware that Baz was taking Greek merely to fill up a class slot; he was already more than proficient in the language.  
The Mage frowned.  


“Can’t it wait? I was having a discussion with Basilton.”  


Snow lifted his eyes to meet the Mage’s.  


“It cannot.”  


The Mage’s expression flickered with confusion. Obviously the Mage had picked up on Snow’s weird mood.  


“Oh, all right. I suppose it’s fine, if Baz is okay with it.”  


Baz thought about it. He didn’t like being escorted by Snow like some kind of errant child. He also didn’t feel like dealing with the Minotaur. But curiosity about why Snow was acting so strange won out over the rest.  


“It’s fine with me. We can continue this at another time.”  


The Mage nodded.  


Then Snow grabbed Baz’s arm and led him out of the room. Baz allowed it, but only because he was too shocked to pull away. As soon as they were outside of the room Baz ripped his arm out of Snow’s grasp and glared at him.  


“What the hell was that all about?” Baz asked.  


Snow’s face went from thinly veiled fury to outright rage.  


“What do you think you were doing in there?”  


Baz glared at him.  


“I was following the Mage’s orders for Merlin’s sake! He called me into his office.”  


Snow shook his head.  


“You think, with everything that’s going on, it’s a smart idea to be talking to the Mage?”  


Baz sneered.  


“What do you care Snow? Isn’t it my business how I damn myself?”  


Snow ran a hand through his blonde curls roughly.  


“Baz. You need to stay the hell away from the Mage. Don’t ask me why. Just…for once in your life take my advice.”  


Baz shook his head in disbelief. It didn’t make any sense; Snow warning him off of the Mage. Snow was like a Mage mini me most of the time. Baz couldn’t fathom where Snow’s head was at.  


“I don’t see why I should. Couldn't this be a set up? Get me to think you’re on my side and strike when I’m vulnerable? Besides, I don’t like being told what to do.”  


Snow growled and threw Baz up against the wall.  


“Stay. The. Fuck. Away.”  


Baz’s eyes widened. He had never seen Snow like this. They had thrown fists and kicked the shit out of each other a thousand times over the years but Snow had never looked this out of control. Baz could throw him off if he wanted to, could do a lot worse than that too. But he felt trapped for some reason, like the weight of Snow’s anger was freezing him in place.  


“Snow…what is going on?”  


He watched as the anger in Snow’s face faded. His blue eyes were wide with some unnamed emotion. Baz noticed as Snow’s breathing sped up audibly, picked up on Snow’s simultaneously increasing heart rate. There was adrenalin running through Snow’s veins, Baz could smell it. Snow’s grip tightened on Baz’s shirt for a moment. Then he froze, his breathing stopping altogether. He shook his head and unclenched his hands, releasing Baz.  


“Nevermind,” Snow muttered.  


Baz watched in disbelief as Snow stormed away. He had no idea what had just happened or what any of it meant. He felt the need to chase after Snow, to throw him to the ground and force the answers out of him. It was so frustrating having everyone around him telling him what to do while ignoring his questions.  


Baz clenched his jaw tightly. If nobody was going to answer his questions then he’d just have to get the answers himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been so slow with updating this fic, I'm so sorry! I'm going to try to be better about it and update every other day. We will see how successful I am with that, lol.


	6. Promises

Simon

Simon felt out of control as he snuck into the Wavering Wood. Seeing Baz and the Mage in the same room had caused a panicky fever in him that he hadn’t managed to shake off. He had barely been able to hold onto himself when the Mage had put a hand on his shoulder. Then he’d cornered Baz and that had gone completely sideways. Had he not caught himself he might have kissed him. Getting killed by Baz was not going to help anybody however, so Simon needed to get ahold of himself.  


Baz was probably following him. After his strange behavior outside the Mage’s office he would probably have to work twice as hard to throw Baz off. It had just been so frustrating, seeing Baz willingly play into the Mage’s hands. He’d thought Baz knew better than that but, as always, Baz had managed to surprise him.  


Eventually he found the clearing he’d been looking for. She was waiting for him in the center, wearing a dark cloak. All in all, it was a rather over the top display. Simon sighed as he strode forward; amused to see she still wore her Doc Martens.  


“You look ridiculous in that cloak,” He said.  


Fiona sighed and went to pull the hood down. Simon’s hand shot out to stop her.  


“Don’t. I think he followed me.”  


She frowned.  


“He just can’t let go of this, can he?”  


Simon shrugged.  


Her face lit up with a mischievous smile.  


“So the ridiculous cloak comes in handy after all, eh?”  


Simon rolled his eyes.  


“Can we get back to business? I need to be back inside soon.”  


She pursed her lips.  


“Fine, I don’t like to be rushed. But I suppose, given the circumstances, it’s best to dispense with pleasantries…”  


She handed him an envelope. Simon already knew what was inside and quickly tucked it into his jacket.  


“How did you get him to agree to it?”  


She smiled.  


“I told him I’d speak on behalf of his clan when new leadership is appointed.”  


Simon nodded. Nicodemus had signed a confession of everything he’d known about the vampire raid the Mage had tried to set up with him. In return he’d been promised immunity by Simon and made some sort of deal with Fiona. Simon might have to fight the Mage head on but he still needed a paper trail to satisfy the Coven.  


“Anything else?” He asked.  


Fiona bit her lip.  


“The Old Families are getting closer to figuring out that I’m the one that let you go. I’m not sure how long I can keep it buried.”  


Simon frowned.  


“Are you in danger?”  


She rolled her eyes.  


“Of course not. They couldn’t get rid of me if they tried. But I’m worried about what it’ll mean for you.”  


Simon raised his eyebrows.  


“Why would you care about me?”  


She sneered at him.  


“I don’t.”  


He studied her face.  


“You do, but I don’t see why.”  


She stuck her chin out defiantly.  


“You’re risking everything for my nephew. Of course I care. Don’t expect me to say it again.”  


He smiled briefly. Then he remembered what happened in the Mage’s office earlier and his face fell.  


“What is it?’ She whispered.  


“The Mage…he called Baz into his office today. They were talking about the Visitings when I got there.”  


Fiona’s face went white.  


“What did that prat tell the Mage?”  


Simon rubbed his eyes.  


“I don’t know. But it didn’t look good.”  


She groaned.  


“Knowing Baz he probably went along with whatever the Mage said to get more information.”  


Simon nodded.  


“Probably, yeah. I got him out of there and told him to stay away but I think I only made him more suspicious.”  


“He’s going to kill me one of these days,” She said.  


“You and me both,” He muttered.  


She studied his face for a moment.  


“Hey, are you okay? I mean…I’m sure this isn’t easy on you, doing all of this when you feel the way you do.”  


Simon looked away.  


“I’ve been in love with him for years. I’ve gotten used to it.”  


She put her hand on his face to lift it.  


“Thank you for doing this, really.”  


He smiled and put his hand over hers.  


“It’s fine, really Fiona. Goodnight.”  


“Goodnight,” She whispered.  


He broke away from her and stormed out of the forest, hoping he’d been wrong about Baz following him. These secret visits with Fiona were taking their toll on Simon; he wasn’t sure how much more he could hide from everyone around him. He had never imagined that he would be sharing all of his secrets with Fiona Pitch. 

Baz

Baz felt restless. He was waiting in their room for Snow to come back from the Wavering Wood. He was pacing the room, trying to sort through his feelings. When Snow came back he’d need to be calm and collected, not the jittery mess he currently was.  


He’d followed Snow earlier in the wood but hadn’t been able to hear whatever he’d been saying to his nighttime visitor. Snow must have cast **a behind closed doors** spell to block Baz’s vampire hearing. All he knew was that the visitor had touched Snow’s face. He didn’t fully understand why but he felt annoyed.  


If he and Wellbelove were rekindling things why were they doing it in the Wavering Wood? And if it wasn’t Wellbelove then that meant that Snow was meeting with a new person to snog in the woods.  


The door to their room opened and revealed an exhausted looking Snow. He nodded briefly at Baz and moved to his wardrobe to get ready for bed. Baz knew it would be stupid to admit he’d followed Snow. But he couldn’t shake off the annoyance he felt over having seen Snow with his mysterious lover in the woods.  


“I saw you earlier.”  


Snow’s shoulder’s tensed.  


“I know you did.”  


Baz felt his cheeks warm slightly.  


“You knew I was following you?”  


Snow turned to glance at him tiredly.  


“I know you’re trying to figure me out Baz. I pretty much assume you could be following me at any moment these days.”  


Baz sneered.  


“If that’s true then why are you leading me to your secret snogging sessions in the Wavering Wood?”  


Snow froze and turned to stare at him in disbelief.  


“What?”  


Baz clenched his jaw.  


“I saw you with some girl. She was all over you.”  


Snow laughed, a strange edge to his voice.  


“Baz, you have no idea what the fuck you’re talking about.”  


Baz glared.  


“Then why don’t you tell me what it is I’m talking about?”  


Snow groaned.  


“Merlin Baz, I can’t tell you. Don’t you get it? Trust me, if I could tell you I would. Then you could leave me alone.”  


Baz didn't understand why this was bothering him so much. As far as Snow’s secrets went this was probably the least important one. Still, Baz couldn’t shake the desire to demand to know who Snow had been meeting in the woods.  


“Mind filling Wellbelove in this time? That way she doesn’t attack me for your relationship drama again.”  


Snow’s face went white.  


“What did she tell you?”  


Baz crossed his arms over his chest.  


“Nothing too important. Just that you two broke up and that I should stay the hell away from you.”  


Snow swore.  


“Look Baz, I’m sorry about that. It won’t happen again.”  


Baz watched him carefully. Snow was obviously dealing with a lot on his plate. Baz knew he was just making whatever was going on worse for Snow but he couldn’t help it. Being out of the loop was driving him crazy. Still, it wasn’t fair for him to ask Snow for honesty without offering anything in return.  


“Snow,” Baz sighed, “Just talk to me. I promise, whatever it is, I can help you. As long as you don’t force me to help the Mage then I’m sure I could help.”  


Snow’s face looked torn.  


“I made a promise Baz. And not to the Mage. I told them you’d be left out of all of this.”  


Baz glared.  


“Because I’m a villain.”  


Snow’s face softened.  


“Because they care.”  


Baz frowned. Snow looked like he was on the verge of cracking, as though Baz needed only to push him a little bit further to get what he wanted. But the answer made him pause. Who would be working with Snow that cared about him? He couldn't think of anyone stupid enough to do something like that. And then, as if the answer had been obvious the whole time, he suddenly could.  


“Fiona,” He said.  


Snow closed his eyes.  


“Yes. And we’re not snogging by the way.”  


Baz sat down.  


“Why is she working with you? What’s going on?”  


Snow walked to the window.  


“There’s a plan in place. It’s…delicate. She’s worried that if you know too much that it might get you hurt.”  


Baz studied Snow’s face.  


“And you?” Baz asked.  


“What?”  


“Are you worried that I’ll get hurt?”  


Snow’s eyes flickered over his face.  


“No. Nothing can hurt you.”  


Baz smiled in spite of himself.  


“Then are you going to fill me in?”  


Snow closed his eyes tight. Baz could tell that he was making a decision, one that was probably going to change Baz’s life. But this was what he’d been waiting for. Now that he knew Fiona was involved there was no going back. He needed to know what was happening, to help his family whatever the cost.  


“Please Snow, let me decide if I can handle this or not.”  


Snow opened his eyes.  


“All right. I’ll tell you everything. But you have to promise that no matter what I tell you, we handle this together, agreed?”  


Baz nodded.  


“Agreed.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes I can update really fast! I'm really happy I get to post another chapter this quickly. All the comments on this fic have made me really happy and I'm excited that so many of you are enjoying this :)


	7. Out In the Open

Simon

Simon shouldn’t have promised to tell Baz everything. Here he was asking Baz to trust him and promise to work through this thing together when he couldn’t even tell Baz the most important part. That the reason he was doing everything in his power to protect Baz was because he was in love with him. Regardless, he would just have to make do with what he could tell him and hate himself silently for the rest later.  


Baz sat down across from Simon on his bed. Even though they were separated by a couple of feet, Simon felt as if his nerves were on fire. Sometimes Baz’s magic intensified the feeling, the thick feeling of it pressing against his skin almost as if they were touching. He shook his head, trying to regain his focus.  


“Okay,” Simon started, “I’m not sure how to begin…”  


“How about at the beginning?” Baz asked, heavily sarcastic.  


“The beginning?” Simon asked.  


“How you got involved with my aunt,” Baz said.  


“Yeah, I guess that’s a good start. By the way, how could you have ever thought I was snogging your aunt?”  


Baz glared at him.  


“I don’t really think that’s the most important detail to discuss at the moment, do you?”  


“Fine, I was just curious,” Simon grumbled, “Okay well it all started after she set me free-“  


Baz sat up straighter.  


“She set you free? From who? Which old family had you locked up?”  


Simon looked away.  


“I’m not sure that you’ll want to hear this.”  


“Just spit it out Snow.”  


Simon sighed.  


“Okay, it was your dad. He and a bunch of your cousins had me kidnapped and tortured.”  


He paused to let Baz process that. Baz’s face was carefully neutral but Simon could see the tension underneath it. He wasn’t sure why it bothered Baz so much. It wasn’t as if he and Simon were close, in fact Simon was pretty sure Baz would have helped if his father had filled him in. Eventually Baz nodded, seemingly shaking off any of his residual discomfort.  


“All right, continue,” Baz said.  


Simon nodded.  


“Okay, yeah. So after she let me go she told me that you were in danger and she needed my help.”  


Baz sneered.  


“She might’ve thought to tell me that. It’s not like I can’t take care of myself.”  


“She said telling you everything might make you vulnerable. And Baz, she’s right. What I’m about to tell you, it’s bad.”  


Baz studied Simon’s face.  


“Fine, just get it over with,” Baz said.  


Simon wished he could just say it, get it over with like ripping off a bandage. But this was Baz and Simon felt his own heart breaking when he thought about what this information could do to him. Still, he had to try to get the words out.  


“The Mage is coming after you and we’re worried he has the power to succeed,” Simon said.  


“Coming after me how…?”  


“He’s trying to kill you,” Simon said.  


Baz’s eyes widened.  


“I know he hates my family but isn’t that a bit excessive?”  


“Not for him,” Simon said warily, “You won’t be his first murder.”  


Baz eyed Simon suspiciously.  


“You’re actually accusing your precious mentor of murder?”  


Simon gritted his teeth.  


“He’s not mine and he’s definitely not precious to me,” Simon spat.  


“What did he do to turn you against him?” Baz asked.  


“Baz, I don’t know how to tell you this but I’m just going to come out and say it.”  


He lifted his eyes to meet Baz’s.  


“The Mage killed your mother.”  


Baz froze.  


“No, the Humdrum did.”  


“No it didn’t. Fiona came to get me because your mother came to her during the Visitings. She told her that she needed to find her killer and insisted the humdrum didn’t do it,” Simon said.  


“So, naturally it was the Mage who did it,” Baz replied, disbelief coloring his tone.  


“Your mother told Fiona to talk to Nicodemus. Turns out Nico and your aunt go way back. He’s a down on his luck vamp who the Mage tried to hire to orchestrate the Watford Tragedy,” Simon said.  


“Did he do it?” Baz asked tightly.  


“No,” Simon shook his head, “But it’s evidence that the Mage is the one who sent the vampires in. It just means he went to someone else.”  


Baz’s fists were clenched so tight that the skin on his knuckles was white.  


“I’m going to kill him,” Baz said.  


“There’s more.”  


“What more could there possibly be?”  


“The Mage thinks your mom came to you during the Visiting, not your aunt. He thinks you’re in on his secret and that’s why he wants to kill you.”  


Baz shook his head.  


“Well, I certainly made it easier for him to think that when I went to his office earlier.”  


Simon sighed.  


“Yes you did. You’ve made it hard for me to protect you.”  


Baz frowned at him, his eyes curious.  


“Why are you protecting me?”  


Simon felt his stomach dip nervously.  


“What?”  


Baz’s frown deepened.  


“What could you possibly gain from helping me? My father kidnapped and tortured you. I’ve spent my whole life trying to make yours miserable. It doesn’t make sense for you to protect me.”  


Simon wanted to tell the truth. He kept thinking about Agatha calling him a coward, about how good it would feel to prove her wrong. He would finally be free of the secret that had weighed on him for years. But telling Baz the truth meant risking their shakily formed alliance. He couldn’t put Baz’s life in danger just because he wanted to share his feelings.  


“Your aunt freed me. I owe the Pitchs, not the Grimms,” Simon said.  


“I’m both.”  


Simon shrugged.  


“Your aunt made the request. I’ve done as she's asked.”  


Baz shook his head.  


“Okay fine, that part makes sense. But why do you hate the Mage all of a sudden? It’s not like you care about me or my mother.”  


Baz was so wrong, so far off.  


“I have my reasons,” Simon said.  


“You said you’d tell me everything,” Baz said, accusingly.  


“Your aunt dug up some more information about the Mage. Information specific to my birth.”  


“So?”  


Simon felt rage grow inside of him.  


“Your mother was not his first murder either.”  


Baz ‘s expression became cautious.  


“He killed your parents?”  


Simon laughed bitterly.  


“He’s the reason my mother is dead, though I’m sure he didn’t go out of his way to do it. He was never too concerned with the details.”  


“And your father?” Baz asked, his voice hesitant.  


“He is my father,” Simon replied, flatly.  


Baz opened his mouth to reply and then closed it. They sat in silence for a few minutes. Finally, Baz cleared his throat.  


“I’m sorry.”  


Simon threw up his hand.  


“Don’t. It doesn’t matter anymore. All that matters is that you know now why I’m invested in this. I’m not backing down,” Simon said.  


“So what are you saying we should do?”  


“Wait for the Mage to make his move on you.”  


“And then?” Baz asked.  


“And then we fight him and hope to Merlin that we win,” Simon said.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so happy that I've gotten more consistent with updates. School starts back up again for me on Monday though, so hopefully I'll be able to continue this updating streak but classes might impact it.


	8. Friends

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so so so sorry for how late this update is. I don't know what has been wrong with me but I have just not had it in me to update lately. But here is, in what I hope will become the first of many, an update. I know it isn't very long, but I hope you enjoy!

Baz

He hated to admit it, but he felt a certain amount of satisfaction from sitting at the table with Snow and his perfect buddies. Many had tried to break the bubble of golden sunlight around the trio, none before Baz had succeeded. Still, he was only here because of Snow and his entry was highly conditional. And temporary. He had to remind himself that this wasn’t going to be a permanent situation, playing nice with Snow. This was for his protection only. Once the Mage crossed a line and they fought him, well…Baz wasn’t sure exactly what would happen next, but he knew it wouldn’t include teatime with the Scooby gang.

“Okay so…we’re really just going to wait for the Mage to make a move?” Baz asked.

Bunce frowned.

“I guess so. Simon seems to think it’s the best idea.”

Baz felt a frisson of surprise at the disappointment in Bunce’s voice. He had always assumed that the whole lot of them agreed on everything.

Snow rubbed his eyes tiredly.

“If we make a move now, we might screw up things on Fiona’s end. It’s technically her word against the Mage. I’m sure you’re all aware how that will go with the Coven.”

Baz grimaced.

“Okay, fine you’re right. Still, it feels strange to do nothing.”

Snow smirked.

“I never said that we had to sit around and play dumb students while we wait.”

Baz’s interest perked up.

“Oh, what’s your grand idea then?”

Snow looked over at where the Mage stood talking to some of the other faculty members. He didn’t often visit the dining hall but on the occasion he did, it usually meant he was sniffing around for information. After a second or so, the Mage’s gaze flickered over to Snow and then to the rest of the table. Baz watched in amusement as the Mage frowned at the arrangement.

“We’re already doing something,” Snow said, satisfaction in his voice.

“So you’re planning on annoying the Mage to death? Wonderful idea Simon, I’m sure that’ll solve everything,” Wellbelove muttered.

Bunce turned to her.

“All right, if you’re so eager for a stronger plan then I’ve got a task for you. Why don’t you start talking about the Mage to your dad? You could slip little bits of negative information to him every now and then.”

Wellbelove squinted her eyes angrily.

“Why in Merlin would I ever do that?”

“Because your father is on the Coven,” Baz answered.

She turned to glare at him, her cheeks burning red from emotion.

“I don’t remember asking _you_ a question.”

Baz was not sure how but he had managed to make an enemy of Wellbelove. He remembered her instruction to stay the hell away from Snow and smirked. Staring at her, Baz leaned over and wrapped his arm around Snow’s shoulder and squeezed it. Snow jolted slightly and Baz suppressed the thirst that Snow’s ridiculous blush caused in him.

“What’s wrong Wellbelove? Bothered that Snow’s my new best friend? I’m getting a charm bracelet engraved after classes and everything.”

She looked at the arm looped around Snow and bit her lip. Her expression shifted as she looked at Snow; eyes widening in disbelief, her mouth turned down in sadness. Then she turned her gaze back to Baz with a look of such blinding hate that Baz dropped his hand away from Snow in alarm.

“You’re a twisted son of a bitch, you know that right?” Wellbelove spat.

“Watch it,” Baz growled.

Snow slapped his hand sharply on the wood of the table.

“Both of you stop it!” Snow said.

Baz sneered but said nothing else. Wellbelove didn’t look angry anymore, just a tad bit ashamed. Bunce was staring at them all with a frown that said _you are all a mess and I don’t even know where to begin to help you_. Baz wondered if this could ever work, with all the anger they all held towards one another.

“Baz,” Bunce said.

“Yes?”

She glanced at Snow pursed her lips, delivering some indecipherable message. Then she turned back to Baz and cleared her throat.

“Agatha is just being protective of Simon. You have to understand; your family kidnapped and tortured Simon. Even though you weren’t a part of that, you still made Simon’s life hell over the years.”

Baz glanced at Snow and felt for the first time a twinge of guilt. He knew that his father had been trying to protect his family but torturing Snow was not the right way to do so, not the way his mother would have done it. And even though he hated Snow, he realized that he really had been a difficult prat towards him since they had met. For all of that to have happened and then to have Snow offer to protect him…Baz realized that he was really in no position to complain. Even about Wellbelove’s ridiculous anger.

“You’re right,” Baz muttered.

“And,” Bunce began, voice tentative, “When Simon becomes….friends with someone, it means something. He doesn't just throw the word around for the fun of it.”

Baz glanced at Snow, who was looking determinedly away from them all.

“I didn’t realize we were friends all of a sudden. Is that what you want Snow?”

Bunce’s eyebrows scrunched together, forming a V of concern on her forehead. Something in Baz’s question had invited her disapproval.

Snow turned to look at Baz, his eyes masking some unnamed emotion.

“It is not the first word that comes to mind but…sure, friends would be good. Would be especially helpful in this situation.”

Baz shrugged.

“Fine, we can try it. But it won’t last, I can guarantee it.”


	9. Late Night Questions

Simon

Exhaustion weighed heavily on Simon’s limbs as he entered the room with Baz. They had spent the last hour or so working on Simon’s spell accuracy. According to Baz, if Simon were going to protect him, he’d need to be able to choke out a half decent spell. Simon knew he was right but it still irked him how superior Baz acted about it.

He groaned as he dropped onto his bed, his muscles twitching with overexcited magic. Once he got started casting, it was always difficult to calm his body down. Being made of magic definitely had its drawbacks.

He felt a tap on his shoulder and nearly jumped out of his skin. Baz was standing above him, his hand snatched away and eyes wide. Simon felt instant regret, he knew his skin acted sometimes as a current and realized he must have hurt Baz.

“I-I’m sorry. My body just…”

Baz frowned.

“That was weird, I felt your magic,” Baz said.

Simon searched the room with his senses.

“Am I really leaking that much?”

Baz shook his head.

“No I meant, when I touched you, I felt it.”

“I didn’t hurt you?” Simon asked.

Baz’s frown deepened.

“No.”

They watched each other silently for a moment before Simon could no longer take it. It was too intense having Baz stand next to his bed while his magic ran wild. He kept imagining a million different spells he could cast and a million different things he could do with his hands.

“So, what’s up?” Simon asked.

“Hm?”

Simon sat up.

“Well you tapped me for a reason, didn’t you?” Simon asked.

Baz blinked.

“Oh,” He muttered, “Yeah. Sorry I just…I wondered if you’d left anything out about the conversation between my aunt and my mother during the Visiting.”

Simon thought about it for a moment.

“No I don’t think I did.”

Baz looked away.

“Do you think my aunt might have left something out then? Like she only thought to share the murder plot with you?”

Simon couldn’t figure out where Baz was going with his questions but he sensed a vulnerability in his words. He tried to answer as gently as possible.

“I’m sure she could have. If they had discussed anything private I don’t think she’d want to share that with me. But she never mentioned keeping something to herself, if that’s what you’re asking.”

Baz nodded and then turned away.

“You could always ask her,” Simon said.

Baz shook his head.

“No, no I couldn’t.”

“I don’t see why not. She adores you and I’m sure she’d tell you anything you’d want if you just-“

“Not,” Baz interrupted, “If she thought it might hurt me.”

Simon bit his lip. They’d never talked like this before, like they actually wanted to. It was strange and amazing and way too overwhelming for Simon to handle.

“Why would it hurt you?”

“Maybe…maybe my mother didn’t want to see me. I was right here, this whole time. And she never once tried to reach me.”

Simon felt his heart thump painfully. Baz was worried that his mother had purposely avoided him. Simon wanted to tell him how stupid that was but stopped himself. What did he know about Natasha Pitch? Maybe Baz had a reason to think his mother would do that. It wasn’t Simon’s business. And yet.

“The spirits, they only have so much energy Baz. I think she was only able to visit one person,” Simon said.

“Of course,” Baz replied, stiffly.

“Baz I’m sure she wanted to see you.”

Baz snorted, but his shoulders were hunched oddly, as if he was trying to hold himself together.

“Your safety was on the line Baz,” Simon continued, “Telling you would have meant putting you in danger. Besides, Fiona was the one who knew Nicodemus, who grew up with him.”

Baz turned rapidly, glaring at Simon.

“And? She knows I could handle this! At least I think she does…did.”

Simon stood, his hand twitching at his side. He wanted to hold Baz’s shoulder, to rub his back and try to comfort him. Instead he put his hand in his pocket.

“I’m sure she knows you could handle it. But Baz, she’s a mom.”

Baz sneered, “So?”

“Her first instinct is to protect you and she can’t do that anymore…”

Baz flinched.

“So she gave the information to someone she knew could,” Simon said.

Baz stared at Simon. It was unclear in that moment whether he had made things better or worse for Baz. He felt the distance between them, in place like a physical blockade.

“Baz if this is about, you know, what you _are_ I seriously doubt-“

“ _Stop._ ”

Baz had jerked back like Simon had hit him. Simon felt an echo of the blow as he realized he had somehow hurt Baz. All he’d wanted to do was challenge whatever negative assumption Baz had been making, not to strike a nerve.

“I need to go for a walk,” Baz whispered.

Then he was walking out of the room, no coat in hand and his back tense.

Simon pushed his hands through his hair and sighed. Somehow he was always messing things up. He knew where Baz was going and he knew he needed to stay away. He walked over to the window and looked out at the White Chapel.

Baz was there, in the depths of the Catacombs. Further from Simon’s reach than he had ever been.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I knew if I had Natasha visit Fiona instead of Baz that I would need to write about Baz's struggle with that info. Don't worry, I plan to have Baz work through it :) Hope you're all enjoying this fic so far, thank you for all of your lovely comments.


	10. Potions and Secrets

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As I update this I am dreaming about ice cream...I wonder what Simon and Baz's favorite flavor are? ANYWAYS I hope you enjoy this chapter! I wanted to give Agatha some of her own space to think :)

Agatha

There was something off about Baz. He had dark circles under his eyes and refused to help Agatha with the potion they were making for lab. She was trying to make an effort to be nice to him but he was acting exceedingly difficult.

“Baz!”

He blinked a few times and then looked at Agatha as if he had only just noticed her sitting there. For a moment his face was open, she could tell that something had him seriously down. Then he seemed to realize who she was and his face turned into a sneer.

“Yes?” He asked, voice edged.

She pointed to the cauldron bubbling between them.

“Did you plan on helping me with this mute serum or what?”

He grunted.

“Doesn’t even work anyways, I don’t see the point.”

Agatha frowned.

“According to Penny, afflicted who drink this have seen remarkable improvements in their speech skills-“

Baz cut her off.

“Bunce is putting it nicely. In reality all this will do is help you whisper again, not a very useful skill for magic. The only real way to restore the ‘afflicted’s’ voice is through dark magic.”

“I bet you know a lot about that,” Agatha said.

He studied her for a moment.

“I don’t remember you being this unpleasant before this year,” He said.

She felt her face heat. For a long time Agatha had actually been pretty nice to Baz, never understanding Simon’s weird discomfort around him. It wasn’t until Simon had broken up with her over his feelings for Baz that she had come to hate him. It was just so unfair, Baz getting Simon’s affections and all that. Agatha cared about Simon, actually took care of him. Baz was the cruelest person in Simon’s life and yet he somehow managed to steal away Simon’s heart.

“Speaking of unusual behavior, why are you acting so strange today?” She asked, avoiding his question.

Baz glared at her.

“That’s none of your business.”

“I’m doing this lab alone because of it, whatever _it_ is.”

He sighed.

“I had a serious conversation with Snow last night. It got weird and I-I don’t know.”

She stared at him. Agatha wondered if it was possible that Simon had finally told Baz the truth. He didn’t look like a person who just found out their enemy was in love with them. Then again, Simon’s feelings probably meant less than nothing to Baz. She felt a surge of jealousy and protectiveness.

“So he told you?” Agatha asked.

“He told me he wasn’t withholding anything about the conversation between my mother and my aunt, why? _Is_ he hiding something?”

_Oh_ Agatha thought. So he hadn’t confessed.

“No. He’s told you everything he’s told me and Penny. If he’s hiding something then he’s hiding it from all of us.”

Baz nodded, his eyes far away.

Class went on. Agatha continued to try her best on the potion while Baz gazed off at some invisible dilemma. Agatha wondered what Simon saw in the prat as her potions teacher congratulated them both on their hard work.

As she was walking out the door she felt a hand stop her.

“Can I talk to you?” Baz asked.

She frowned but nodded, curious to see where this was going.

Baz

Wellbelove led the way to a small alcove in an almost empty corridor. She didn’t look nervous to be around him, which was weird considering he was pretty sure Snow had told her and Bunce that he was a vampire.

Her shiny blonde hair distracted the few third years that were clustered in the hall. Baz resisted the urge to roll his eyes. He himself was gay, but he supposed, were he to think objectively, he could understand the fascination to a certain extent. There was no denying that she was beautiful. But Baz knew there was something harsh under all that golden light and sunshine, a core that burned to be more than a Chosen One’s trophy. He wondered who the unlucky guy, or girl for that matter, would be to uncover it all.

“What did you want to talk about Baz?”

He studied her face.

She was definitely hiding something. Her eyes were too wide and her stance too defensive to be natural. There was something she knew that she didn’t want Baz to figure out. Somehow he would need to unravel it, whatever the _it_ was.

“Before, during class, you asked _‘So he told you?’_ What did you mean by that, exactly?”

Her cheeks reddened.

“Th-that doesn’t…it’s not…”

Baz crossed his arms.

“I’m waiting,” He said.

She glared at him.

“I don’t have to tell you anything.”

“What about our truce?” Baz asked.

“Your _truce_ is with Simon, not me.”

“Snow has something he’s keeping from me.”

She stayed silent.

“That wasn’t a question. I already know the answer. I just need you to tell me what he’s hiding,” He said.

Wellbelove made a noise of disbelief.

“I don’t see why you think I would ever tell you.”

“Because if you do, I promise I won’t kill him.”

Her eyes widened.

“What?” She whispered.

He smiled.

“Let’s face it goldie, we both know at the end of this whole thing the Mage is going to try to take Snow and I down. I was prepared to let him, take down Snow that is. But I won’t, if you tell me. I’ll even cast a **swear on my life**.”

Her face twisted in disgust.

“Simon is doing all of this because he wants to help you, _to protect you_. And this is how you repay him?” She said.

Baz clenched his jaw. He had never planned to sacrifice Snow to the Mage. As much as he didn’t like the git, he wasn’t prepared to throw all of Snow’s help back in his face. But he needed something to barter with and he had no qualms about lying to Wellbelove, who already thought he was the scum of the Earth anyways.

“Tell me and you will be helping to protect him,” Baz said.

She stared at him for a moment and then shook her head.

“You really are amazing Baz.”

“So you’ll tell me?” He asked.

She smiled.

“No, actually, I won’t. Even if you do swear, it doesn’t mean you won’t kill Simon the first chance you get once the Mage is out of the picture. And now that you’ve told me what you’re planning…I can protect him from you myself.”

When she was done talking she turned away from him and began walking down the hallway.

“I am more than just a head of pretty blonde hair Basilton, you’d do good to remember that,” Wellbelove said.

“Just tell me if it’s about me!” Baz yelled.

She laughed coldly, not pausing in her walk.

“Simon has secrets Baz. You’ll just have to suffer for them along with the rest of us.”

Baz stood in the hallway, feeling strange.

_Simon has secrets._

What did that mean? And what did they have to do with him?

He was disturbed by how desperately he wanted to find out.


	11. Revelations of the Heart

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can I just say how much I love Baz? Because I think it's pretty obvious how much I love Simon but, y'all, just so you know I freakin' adore Baz. So here's to Baz having a pleasant convo with Simon, I think it's long overdue. Thank you so much for continuing to read and I hope you enjoy :)

Simon

Simon was not really in the mood to deal with an argument with Baz. Ever since the night that Baz had walked out and hidden in the Catacombs, Simon was left feeling awkward around Baz. To make matters worse, Baz had pissed off Agatha and even had Penny alarmed with what he had told Agatha after potions class the other day.

He watched as Baz closed his textbook and stood.

“Baz?”

Baz didn’t stop moving, but didn’t ignore Simon either.

“Yeah?”

Simon sighed.

“Agatha is making some headway with her father. She thinks she might be able to persuade him to our side. But she’s unhappy about it.”

“Big surprise,” Baz muttered.

“She’s unhappy about because she feels…well she thinks you’re going to betray us.”

Baz turned to stare at Simon, his expression unreadable.

“What did she tell you?”

Simon rolled his eyes.

“Relax Baz, it’s not like you haven’t threatened to kill me a million times before. I told her it wasn’t a big deal but I need you to chill out a bit if we’re going to make this work.”

Baz winced.

“So you believe her?”

Simon frowned.

“Of course. She’s one of my best friends.”

“And I just want to kill you any chance I get, don’t I?’ Baz asked.

Simon looked away. As much as he wanted to believe that this whole truce thing meant something to Baz, he was pretty sure it didn’t. Baz had been coached since childhood to hate Simon, and had plenty reason to be scared considering what Simon knew about him and his family. There had always been the unspoken expectation that someday one of them would really kill the other. What Baz didn’t know was that Simon would definitely be the one to lose. If it came down to a fight, Simon didn’t have the heart to stop Baz the way he’d need to. The worst part was that everyone around them wanted the fight. Except for maybe Penny.

“I believe that you told her you wanted to kill me, yes. If you are saying that your words don’t match your intentions…then be my guest,” Simon said.

Baz studied him.

“Why are you being so nice to me? It wasn’t always like this. You used to curse the ground I walked on.”

Baz was right. Up until the end of last school year, Simon had been just as big a prat to Baz as Baz was to him. He hadn’t realized it at the time, but it was because he’d been fighting off his feelings for years. Better to punch your enemy in the face out of anger than to realize that you’re in love with him, the one person you’ll never be able to have. Once he’d finally let the truth sink in, all his anger had melted away.

“Well I…Agatha told you I had secrets,” Simon said.

Baz, in spite of himself, quirked up his lips.

“Yes. She did. And I’m guessing you’re never going to tell me what they are.”

Simon laughed softly.

“You know me well.”

“Not really,” Baz said.

Simon couldn’t help but stare at him. Baz’s face was soft for once, his mouth relaxed in a rare way. Simon wondered what it would be like to cross the distance of the room and kiss him, to do what he wanted for once instead of what he thought was right. Baz’s grey eyes were open to him and Simon was pretty sure he could get one kiss in before Baz threw him off.

“I don’t think you want to hear them. My secrets, I mean,” Simon said.

“Why not? It’s not as if you could hurt me any more than the rest of the world has.”

Simon shook his head.

“I don’t think it would hurt you. If anything I think it would just make your life more complicated. Which is the last thing you need right now.”

Baz lay back on his bed and watched Simon.

“It’s strange,” Baz said.

“What is?”

“I feel like we’re becoming something…different. Something other than enemies.”

Simon lay back on his own bed, watching Baz from about a foot away.

“That’s a dangerous thing to say,” He whispered.

Baz’s grey eyes had become almost warm, giving his face a touch of vulnerability.

“I lied,” Baz said.

“About?”

“I lied to Agatha when I told her I planned to let you take the fall with the Mage. I wouldn’t…whatever else you think of me I wouldn’t do that,” Baz said.

Simon felt his heart jump.

“I want to believe that,” Simon said.

“I’ve never wanted to kill you, not really. And what my father did to you, well, he’ll never apologize for it.”

“I know,” Simon said.

“But I’m sorry about it. If I hadn’t been so caught up on you and thinking about what you could be planning out there then maybe…I don’t know maybe I could have figured it out,” Baz said.

“Even if you had, you wouldn’t have let me go.”

“Because I’m a villain?” Baz asked.

“No, not a villain, just a boy. A boy who protects his family, even if they aren’t doing what they should be,” Simon said.

Baz’s eyes widened in surprise.

“Snow I wouldn’t…I don’t want to hurt you. And I wouldn’t, even if it meant going against my father.”

Simon didn’t think he could take anymore without blurting all of his feelings out. So he turned over and pulled the covers up.

“You don’t believe me,” Baz muttered.

Simon thought about saying nothing, about how easy it would be to pretend he hadn’t heard what Baz had said. But he couldn’t help himself. Being around Baz was like eating scones for Simon; he knew he shouldn’t keep going but he couldn’t stop even if he wanted to.

“I don’t know if I’ll ever tell you all of my secrets Baz, but I’ll tell you one,” Simon said.

He waited to hear if Baz was still awake.

“All right,” Baz said.

“Even though I know I shouldn’t, even though everyone around me would tell me I’m stupid for it, I believe you,” Simon said.

“You do?”

“Yes,” Simon said.

He didn’t say anything after that and neither did Baz. He just let himself fall asleep and hope that he was right about Baz.

Baz

Snow had fallen asleep a while ago but Baz couldn’t bring himself to do the same. For reasons unknown to him, he kept replaying their conversation over and over again in his head.

Despite everything, Snow believed him. It was ridiculous and stupid and downright amazing. Baz felt a mixture of anxiety and happiness rise up in his chest at the memory.

He had meant what he said. He didn’t want to kill Simon Snow. He didn’t even want to hurt him. And for Snow, after all that had passed between them, to believe him was an undeserved achievement.

Still, he wasn’t sure what had him so happy or so guilty. Sure, the truce was nice, but it didn’t warrant the feelings keeping him from sleeping.

He turned and stared at Snow, asleep with a hand thrown above his head. There was something peaceful about him, which seemed at odds with the true power roiling beneath the surface. Maybe Baz was happy to be closer to that, the ally of a super being.

Or, maybe, he could just let himself feel this.


	12. Meeting of the Minds

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am currently sick in bed and wishing I could spell myself better. Regardless, it also means I have more time to update, since I'm stuck at home. So I'm hoping to update a few times over the next few days. I hope you enjoy! :)

Penny

Penny stood outside of Baz and Simon’s room with a stressed out Agatha at her side. She had, of course, insisted that there was no danger of them being caught but Agatha, being Agatha, had chosen to not listen to a single word. Penny could practically feel her shaking.

“Agatha, for the last time, you are completely safe! Nobody is going to have us expelled.”

Agatha bit her lip.

“How do you know for sure?” She asked.

“Because I’ve been up here loads of times before and nothing happened!”

Agatha glared at her.

“Why have _you_ been up here loads of times?”

Penny could not believe they were actually going there.

“That’s right, I forgot to mention it earlier, I’ve been secretly in love with Baz for years and sneak up here in my spare time to stalk him!”

Baz opened the door and smiled at Penny appreciatively.

“Well now, was that so hard to admit? At last, we can begin our whirlwind romance,” Baz said.

“Oh Baz, you fiend,” Penny cooed, slapping him on his jacket lapel as she stepped into the room.

Agatha trailed in, obviously immune to the comedic sarcasm between Penny and Baz. She knew Agatha would get over the whole thing quickly but Penny had no idea how Agatha could be so upset when Simon had told them both he was in love with Baz. Penny was Simon’s best friend, that was it. And really, Penny thought, it was time for Agatha to accept that she was just a friend now too.

Simon sat backwards at his desk, arms crossed over the back of his chair and chin rested on his hands. He smiled as Baz sat on in his own desk chair and pulled up next to Simon. To Penny’s absolute disbelief, Baz smiled back.

“Everyone’s getting along I see?” Penny murmured.

Simon gave her a pointed look.

“Yes, it turns out it was a misunderstanding. Baz never planned to kill me, he just wanted to bribe Agatha.”

“With your life,” Agatha muttered.

“A very valuable thing, apparently,” Baz said.

His words were sarcastic but his tone was playful and he even threw a half smile Agatha’s way. Penny wondered if Simon had spelled him drunk.

“All right, well I’m sure you’re all as sick of lying low as I am,” Simon said.

Penny nodded vigorously.

“Finally! So we’re going to make a move? Against the Mage?”

Simon bit his lip.

“Er…not exactly,” He said.

Penny resisted the urge to groan.

“Then what is it you’re suggesting Simon?” Agatha asked.

Simon looked visibly uncomfortable.

“Well, I haven’t exactly told Fiona yet that I brought you all into this.”

Baz frowned at Simon.

“My aunt doesn’t know that I know?”

“No she doesn’t know that you know,” Simon said.

Baz rubbed his temple, obviously stressed.

“All that _I know_ is that we’d better tell her soon. Fiona Pitch is not a woman I want to mess with,” Agatha said.

“Okay,” Penny began, “So then I’m guessing the plan is to meet up with Fiona and fill her in on everything that’s going on?”

Simon nodded.

“Exactly. And I’m supposed to meet with her tonight.”

Baz shrugged and stood.

“All right let’s make our way to the Wavering Wood.”

Simon grabbed Baz’s sleeve. Penny tensed as she waited for Baz to send a million venomous phrases Simon’s way but was surprised when Baz let himself be pulled back into his chair.

“Actually…I’m not supposed to meet her there tonight.”

“So where are you supposed to meet her?” Penny asked.

Simon looked down at his hands.

“A club.”

Baz rolled his eyes.

“Merlin, Snow just spit it out. What kind of club?”

Simon locked gazes with Penny.

“A vampire club.”

Baz

It had to be a vampire club. Of course it had to be one. Baz felt exceedingly grumpy as the four of them walked towards the fluorescent-lit entryway of the club. Baz could feel the burning gazes of the girls behind him. It made sense that they were staring at him. Snow had probably filled them in long ago about his undead status. They were probably waiting for him to pull out some sort of membership card and present it to the bouncer.

It was Snow, however, who led the way. And it was also Snow who got them past the bouncer and into the smoky room of the club. Baz felt nervous for the first time since they’d snuck out of Watford. Not only was he surrounded by people like him, he was also about to face the wrath of his aunt.

They walked in a cluster, each of them attempting to look cooler than they actually felt. Snow weaved through the packed bodies and got them across the dance floor without alerting too many of the dancing couples. Finally they reached the back of the club. Inset in the walls were cushioned booths with small round tables in the center. At one of them, Baz saw his aunt sitting across from a man, somewhere around her age. When she saw them she froze and immediately zeroed in on Snow.

Baz felt a smile curl on his lips as his aunt jerked her hand at them urgently. She was wearing black skinny jeans and a ripped tank top. Her doc marten clad feet were tapping angrily under the table as they reached her. Baz would never get over his aunt’s ridiculously immature fashion sense but he found her consistency to be amusing.

“ _What are they doing here?_ ” She hissed at Snow as they approached.

Snow laughed nervously.

“Well um, funny story…Baz found out. And well, I told the girls everything as soon as I got back to Watford,” He said.

She glared at him.

“You promised,” She said.

“And I tried to keep it. You never said anything about telling Penny or Agatha,” Snow said.

“Because I don’t know Penny or Amanda!” Fiona spat.

“It’s Agatha,” Wellbelove cut in, face caught somewhere between amusement and awkwardness.

“Oh, Agatha sorry,” Fiona said, “I just…Simon Snow! You are a dead man, do you understand me? I should just throw you back in my brother-in-law’s basement for this!”

“Hey,” Baz pushed himself forward, “You and I both know what Father did was wrong.”

Her eyes swung up to meet his.

“Of course I do, I’m the one who freed the Chosen One and has been keeping your father under control all these weeks.”

Baz frowned.

“What do you mean by ‘under control’?” He asked.

“I’ve had him under a couple of spells, don’t change the subject! How did you find out?”

Baz smirked.

“I found you two talking in the woods,” Baz said.

She turned to Snow.

“So you just told him everything? Just like that?” She asked.

“Well,” Snow cleared his throat nervously, “He was accusing me of having an affair with you so yeah, I told him just like that.”

Her face went a deep red.

“Really Fiona, I didn’t expect you to go after eighteen year olds, bit young aren’t they?” The man from the table asked.

“Shut up Nico, of course I’m not having an affair with Simon. Though I do hear your line has something of an interest for Pitchs.”

Fiona directed the last part of her statement at Snow whose eyes widened considerably.

“What are you talking about? The Mage doesn’t-“ Baz was cut off as Fiona threw a hand over his mouth.

“ _Shhh!_ You can’t just drop his name in here. We could all be arrested for treason. This is why I didn’t want you involved Basilton.”

They all walked to the table and squeezed in together. Bunce shifted uncomfortably next to Fiona and Wellbelove squeezed herself rather comfortably next to Snow. Baz was left to sit next to Nico, whom he had gathered was probably the mysterious Nicodemus.

“Well if we’re not supposed to say his name then what should we call him?” Baz asked.

“Perhaps Davy? You know, the man’s actual name? Surely you didn’t think he was born with the name The Mage,” Nico said, chuckling.

“That’s just weird Nico, I don’t want to say his childhood nickname,” Fiona muttered.

“Fine,” Snow began, hand slapping the table, “What are we going to do about _my father_ , better?”

Wellbelove and Bunce looked up at him in shock. Apparently he had not shared that little detail with the rest of the wonder team. Wellbelove reached across the table to stroke Snow’s hand. When Snow allowed the touch Baz felt the strangest surge of irritation.

“What? He didn’t share that detail with you girls? I guess Snow and I are just that close,” Baz said.

Wellbelove jerked her hand back and stared at Snow.

“You told _him_ and not _us?_ ”

Bunce did not look particularly bothered by Baz's statement. In fact, she seemed oddly happy about the whole thing and was glancing warmly between Baz and Snow.

Snow looked incredibly uncomfortable.

“Um…”

Fiona glanced at Snow, a weirdly sympathetic glint in her eyes.

“Is it me? Or is there something you’re all still keeping from me?” Baz asked.

“Don’t worry mate, I don’t know what the hell’s going on either,” Nico commented.

“Let’s try to get down to business, shall we?” Fiona asked.

Finally they all shared what they had found out. Wellbelove explained that she had convinced her father that the Mage was acting overly aggressive lately during his raids. Bunce said that she had planted the seeds in her parents’ heads that there was something amiss about the Humdrum being blamed responsible for Natasha Pitch’s death. Snow said that he’d done his best to avoid the Mage as much as possible.

“So where does that leave us?” Fiona asked.

“Not with much,” Nico grumbled.

“Your testimony alone is worth a lot,” Wellbelove said.

“My testimony will be questioned unless there is something else to back me up. I’m a disgraced vampire love, my name isn’t even in the book anymore.”

Baz leaned back against the vinyl seat cushion. Nicodemus was right. They still didn’t have enough to go off of. They needed at least one more piece of concrete evidence to back up Nicodemus’s and his mother’s stories. Otherwise, nobody would trust the word of a vampire and a dead woman.

“I’m sure my father will find something. There’s got to be something in his files that shows that the Humdrum wasn’t involved,” Bunce said.

“I guess that’s what we’ll have to wait for,” Wellbelove said.

Snow looked troubled.

“What’s wrong?” Baz asked.

Snow looked up at him in surprise. They watched one another for a moment before Snow responded, his face wary.

“I’m worried that this is taking too long. Every moment we wait is another moment that my father has at his disposal to come after you. I don't think he’ll wait much longer.”

Baz wasn’t sure how to respond. It was still strange, having Snow care for his welfare. He knew Snow had said initially that he was only protecting Baz because of a life debt to Fiona but now he wondered if there was something more to it. Snow looked genuinely upset about the idea of the Mage hurting him. Baz wasn’t sure whether he found the idea to be more unpleasant or comforting.

“Then we don’t have any time to waste,” Fiona said, voice grave.

They all nodded.

“Once your father finds something, we will all meet again. Until then, we need to stay in contact. I’ll have charmed cellphones sent to your dorms so we can stay in contact,” Fiona said.

Bunce smiled.

“I already have one, but I’ll teach the rest how to use them discreetly,” She said.

Fiona nodded and then her and Nicodemus were slipping out of the club, looking as if they were a tired couple going home for the night. After a few minutes they left as well, trying to be as inconspicuous as possible.

The girls were bent over Bunce’s phone, looking like they were typing secret messages back and forth to one another. Seeing that they were distracted, Baz caught up with Snow and began to walk by his side.

“What do you think of all this? Do we have a chance?” Baz asked.

“I think we have a chance. I’m not sure if we can pull this off in the end but we’re definitely better off than we were a few weeks ago.”

“Thank you,” Baz said.

Snow looked up at him.

“For what?”

Baz looked up at the night sky dotted with stars.

“Keeping me safe,” Baz said.

Snow didn’t reply but Baz could sense the happiness coming off of him. They walked together after that, eyes on the stars and minds far away.


	13. Magical Moments

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a warning, this chapter begins with some of Simon's memories of being tortured. It's not that bad or graphic but I still wanted to give you all a heads up. Also, I think this is my favorite chapter for this fic so far. I hope you all enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it <3

Simon

Simon knew he was having a nightmare. He was in a dark room and all he could hear was Malcolm Grimm’s cold laughter. He was writhing in pain on the floor but he found that he couldn’t scream. The pain wasn’t coming from outside of himself but rather from a gnawing sensation that began in his stomach and radiated throughout the rest of his body.

“Snow,” Malcolm said, voice thick with cold amusement.

“ _Please stop_ ,” Simon gasped.

“I’d like to, but you won’t tell me what I need to know,” Malcolm said.

“I-I don’t know. I swear I don’t know how the Mage knew where to find me. All I know is that he’s always thought I was the One.”

“Then you can at least tell me how he plans to use you.”

“I really don’t know!” Simon cried.

The pain was getting worse. He could feel it extending under his finer nails and going deep into his bones. He just wanted it to be over, to say whatever it would take to end this hell. But he didn’t have the information Malcolm needed and he didn’t know how to lie to him. He groaned without meaning to.

“Snow,” Malcolm said.

“ _Please stop! I’m begging you!_ ”

“Snow!” Baz shouted.

Simon realized, wildly, that he was no longer dreaming. Baz was on his bed, hands gripped on his shoulders. He was looking at Simon with real panic in his eyes. Simon didn’t understand for a moment, didn’t remember what he was supposed to do. Without thinking, he gripped Baz’s arms, intending to pull him forward into his arms. He paused, however, when Baz’s face went blank.

Simon realized that gripping Baz in bed like he was might be the last thing Baz expected, or wanted, from him. That realization was cut short as he noticed that Baz wasn’t angry or moving. In fact he looked like he was experiencing something from very far away.

“Snow…you’re magic,” He whispered.

Simon blinked a few times.

“I’m sorry?” Simon whispered.

“I can feel it…your magic,” Baz said.

Simon realized that in the shock of being woken up from his nightmare he had given Baz unmediated access to his magic. There were no walls up between them, and Simon could actually feel Baz tapping into his magic. It was by far the most intimate thing Simon had ever experienced, and he hadn’t even meant for it to happen in the first place.

What was stranger was that Baz seemed like a completely different person. There was an almost child-like expression of wonder on his face. It was as if he wasn’t hiding any of himself for the first time in a long time. His mouth was open in wide, almost smiling.

“Can you…read my mind too?” Simon asked.

“What are you, an idiot? Of course I can’t read your mind,” Baz said.

Simon laughed. Even when Baz was completely stripped of his cold and aloof protective barriers he was still capable of being somewhat of a prat. It was things like this that made Simon fall even more in love with him.

“All right, well can you do anything with it?” Simon asked.

“Like what?” Baz asked.

“I don’t know…use it. I know your magic is powerful but if you’re using mine, well it should feel different.”

Baz bit his lip, concentration evident in his brow.

“ **Take a trip down memory lane** ,” Baz whispered.

Suddenly the room was alight with Baz’s memories. In one corner of the room Simon saw a young Baz walk out of his house to see a small pony with a ribbon on it, while Fiona stood proudly behind it. In another, Baz was playing the violin for his younger siblings, their eyes wide with awe. Simon’s heart ached as the middle of the room was dominated by Baz’s mother, telling a story with fire magic in her hands to Baz; mini fiery figures danced between her palms. Simon’s eyes caught a flicker of movement in the corner of the room closest to him and he jerked back in surprise. It was an image of himself, when he was eleven, during the Crucible ceremony. He watched in amazement as his younger self stumbled over to shake a reluctant younger Baz’s hand.

“Are these your strongest memories?” Simon asked.

“They’re my best,” Baz corrected, almost shyly.

Simon felt a burst of warmth and happiness course through him. To belong to one of Baz’s best memories was an achievement beyond his wildest imaginings. He felt dizzy with the knowledge of this, more out of control than he had ever been in his life.

The images in the room shifted and suddenly it was Simon’s best memories being shown. There was one of walking into Watford for the first time and seeing all of the amazing food on the table. Another showed when he first met Penny. Agatha was there as well, when they went to their first Winter Ball together. And the rest, predictably, were of Baz. There was, of course, the Crucible ceremony. In one instance it showed when he and Baz had played together on the football team and won a game together, even though they’d been fighting almost the entire time. Another showed Baz’s shocked face when the chimera had come after him first instead of Simon. And the last one showed Simon breaking up with Agatha, though the words weren’t audible. Baz wouldn’t be able to tell, but that one was about him as well, it was the first time he had admitted to himself and to someone else that he was in love with Baz.

“Amazing,” Baz whispered.

“Yes,” Simon agreed, looking at Baz’s face rather than the magic surrounding them.

“I-I think it might be getting to be a bit much for me,” Baz said.

“Why?” Simon asked.

“Because I feel like I’m glowing, is that normal?” Baz asked, voice sounding funny.

Slightly alarmed, Simon pulled his hands back. He felt, and saw, as the connection between them was severed. Baz leaned back weakly on his hands but didn’t move away from Simon. They sat in silence for a moment, trying to regain their bearings on Simon’s bed.

“Of course one of your favorite memories would be when that chimera went after me instead of you,” Baz said, obviously amused.

“I couldn't stop laughing for weeks,” Simon said.

“I guess we never really hated each other,” Baz said.

“I guess not,” Simon replied.

Baz studied him, his grey eyes shining in the darkness. Simon wondered briefly if that was a vampire thing or just a Baz thing. Baz’s gaze felt like more than just a curious glance and Simon felt his face heat uncomfortably.

“That was like nothing I’ve ever felt before,” Baz admitted.

“What do you mean?” Simon asked.

“Your magic…I could feel it, use it. I mean, it was like being connected to a never-ending power source.”

“Hm,” Simon said, not particularly interested in the sheer oddity of his power.

“Is that what it feels like for you all the time?” Baz asked.

“Kind of,” Simon said, truthfully, “But for me it always feels like it’s too much. Like I have access to it but it's so full that it might burst out of control at any moment.”

“Merlin,” Baz whispered.

“That felt different though, almost like I could really control it. It was like…as soon as you took on some of the weight of it I could finally wield it.”

“Maybe I’m your wand,” Baz said.

“Shut up.”

For some reason the statement had made his stomach flip excitedly.

“I mean…that’s the weird part isn’t it? The Mage is your father. The wand he gave you is what, your grandfather’s? Now that we know he’s your dad, don’t you think it’s strange that his wand doesn’t work for you?”

Simon shrugged.

“But what you just described…being able to control your magic like that, that’s what it’s supposed to feel like,” Baz said.

“You’re not an object Baz, it’s not as if I can set you in a nice locket.”

“No but maybe you need me, you know? To make the magic work you need me at your side,” Baz said, his eyes bright.

Simon felt caught in that moment, like all of his feelings were on display. He felt the cotton of his shirt against his skin and every inch of space between himself and Baz on the bed. His breathing was accelerated and it seemed like the loudest noise in the room. He watched as the quality of Baz’s gaze changed; went from bewildered excitement to something warmer, headier…

Baz cleared his throat and moved away.

“Well, in any case, it seems I have reason to thank you again,” Baz said.

“What do you mean?”

“Thank you for helping me see my mother, clear as she was when she was alive, again. That was…well, let’s just say this is definitely one of my new best memories,” Baz said.

Simon nodded, his throat swollen with emotion. As Baz fell asleep Simon turned over to watch him. He knew that he would never forget this night, that he too would remember it was one of his best memories.

“Thank you for letting me be one of your best memories,” Simon whispered.

Then he rolled over and let himself go back to sleep, with no fear of the nightmares coming back.

Baz

Snow must have thought he was asleep, must not have been paying attention to Baz’s uneven breathing. Much as he wanted to, Baz couldn’t find the exhaustion he needed to go back to sleep. Snow’s magic still buzzed through his veins, making him feel jittery and jumpy.

And then there was Snow himself. The amazing person who seemed to contradict himself at every moment; at once awkward and humble and then, suddenly, a magical powerhouse, as close to the magnitude of being a Greek god as Baz imagined was possible. He was on the edge of feeling something, of grasping the tendril of an emotion that kept eluding him.

Snow must have thought he was asleep, because in the quiet and darkness of the room, Baz heard quite clearly, his vampire hearing intensifying it, the whisper Simon made in the darkness.

“Thank you for letting me be one of your best memories.”


	14. Blood Promise

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the little break in updates. I had a midterm paper due this past week and didn't have time to write. But I'm back (might have a few more delays tho since I have another paper due in a few days). I can't wait for summer when I can update more frequently, lol. I hope you enjoy this chapter, I had a lot of fun writing it ;)

Simon

Simon had been avoiding Baz all day. After the intimacy of the night before he was almost certain he wouldn’t be able to keep his feelings off of his face. The strange part was that Baz seemed to be looking for him. According to Penny he’d been asking about Simon all morning long. Part of Simon was annoyed; he didn’t want the Mage alerted to their new alliance more than necessary. The other part of him felt nervous and excited, a stupid way to feel considering Baz didn’t mean anything by any of it.

He was in their room, taking a moment’s rest while Baz was stuck in Magical History class, when he heard a tap on the window. He stood and found there was a large raven perched outside of the window. He opened the window and found a note written in unfamiliar handwriting tied to the bird’s leg. It read:

_We have what you need…physical evidence…come to the Wavering Wood at dusk._

“ **Where there’s smoke there’s fire** ,” Simon whispered.

The note burnt in seconds and floated out the window. The raven sat on the sill, watching him with an oddly human-like expression. Simon nodded at it and watched as it flew off in the direction of the Wavering Wood.

It was probably a trap. Simon was almost certain that whatever waited for him in the Wood was not a kind hearted soul just wanting to help. If he went there, he would be dealing with something dark, someone who wanted something from him, and that was it he was lucky. At worst, it could be the Mage’s Men setting up a trap for him. But Simon and the others did need physical evidence to take down the Mage. Which meant that Simon would have to take on the risks and get what needed to be done over with.

He needed to leave, before Baz could find him and ask him where he was going and what he was up to. Quickly, he gathered his wand and a cloak that the Mage had given to him years ago. As he gripped the doorknob he felt the door give way too easily. Baz pushed his way through and stared at Simon. They stood only inches apart, both standing tense and not breathing.

“Excuse me,” Simon said, trying to push past Baz.

Baz put a hand on Simon’s arm.

“Wait.”

Simon gritted his teeth in anticipation.

“I wanted to talk to you about something that happened last night…Wait, why are you wearing a cloak?” Baz asked.

Simon shrugged.

“Going out for a bit, needed to stay warm,” Simon said.

“So a coat just didn’t cut it?” Baz asked.

Simon looked at Baz. It was funny; Simon was only a few inches shorter than Baz but somehow, when he studied Simon like he was, he felt even smaller. They stood staring at one another in the doorway, waiting for someone to back down. After a minute or so of this, Simon felt the mood change. Suddenly he didn’t feel guilty anymore; instead he felt his heart speed up. Baz’s eyes shifted, and Simon realized, with a jolt, that Baz was looking at his chest. _He can probably hear my heart beating faster_ Simon thought.

“Fine! I need to meet someone in the Wavering Wood,” Simon said.

“And what, you were going to do it without me?” Baz asked.

“It’s dangerous,” Simon said.

“I’m a big boy, I think I can handle it,” Baz said.

“It’s not, look…I think it might be a trap,” Simon said, clenching his jaw.

Baz squinted his eyes angrily at Simon.

“And you were going to go into it alone? What is wrong with you?”

Simon couldn’t take the proximity anymore. He pushed Baz away and walked back into the room, feeling defeated.

“I don't mind getting hurt. But I’m not going to put the people I care about in danger.”

“So take me,” Baz said.

Simon laughed humorlessly.

“You’re so thick Baz.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

Simon stared at him.

“Do you really think I’m protecting you because of a life debt? That you’re just an inconvenience that’s been forced on me?” Simon asked.

Baz didn’t reply.

“I care about you and I didn’t want to put you, or Penny, or Agatha, in danger. Are we clear?”

“Yes, you don’t want me coming. Fine, I get it. But I’m coming anyways.”

Simon glared at him.

“No you aren’t," Simon said.

Baz’s stance changed subtly. His body language became combative and his expression deadly. Simon summoned his sword out of instinct. Somehow the atmosphere of the room had become thick with danger.

“I’m not sure you can stop me,” Baz said.

“Why do you even want to come so badly?” Simon asked.

“Because,” Baz began, “I…well, I don’t want you getting killed from your own stupidity.”

Simon groaned.

“ _Fuck!_ Fine, you can come.”

Baz straightened out of his attack stance and smiled boyishly.

Baz

Snow looked ridiculous in his cloak. Ridiculous, but also oddly attractive. Baz wondered idly why he didn’t find the look attractive on any of the Mage’s Men. Shaking his head, Baz tried to focus on the task ahead of them. They were walking into the unknown without any kind of back up, a very stupid and very dangerous plan. Baz made flames in his palms as they went deeper into the Wood.

Snow had told him the author of the note had claimed to have evidence against the Mage. Baz felt it was probably too good to be true. Still, if this was a set up from the Mage’s Men it would be better to face it head on than to wait for them to come for him later. Baz didn’t like to back away from a challenge if he could help it.

“So…the note didn’t say where to wait?” Baz asked.

“It just said to meet in the Wavering Wood, nothing else.”

Baz shrugged and dropped to sit on the ground.

“Then I say we wait here.”

Snow looked unamused as he stood over him.

“We need to look for them,” Snow said.

“I say, they should come to us,” Baz said.

Snow cocked his head to the side.

“Think you’re cute, do you?”

“I’ve been told that I am by many before,” Baz said.

Then he froze as he heard the sound of footsteps. Snow hadn’t picked up on it, and wouldn’t have been able to even if the footsteps had come from close by, unnaturally soft as they were. Baz stood up, dread churning sickly in his stomach.

“We need to leave, _now_ ,” Baz said.

“What’s wrong, what is it?” Snow asked.

Baz stayed silent.

A group of five vampires walked into the small clearing. They looked relatively normal, aside from their bloodstained chins. Baz could tell that had been a purposeful detail, perhaps to intimidate the Mage’s Heir. Baz knew personally how easy it could be to drink blood without making a mess.

“What do you want?” Baz asked.

“We’re not here to see _you_. We made arrangements with the Chosen One,” An older male vampire replied.

“And you won’t have an arrangement with me if you keep talking to him like that,” Snow said, face cold.

“Our apologies,” A cool blonde from the left said, tilting her head.

“My name is Leila,” continued the blonde, “And I’ve heard…whispers that you’re looking for dirt on the Mage.”

"I might be,” Snow said.

“Oh don’t worry,” Leila said, “We’ve made sure nothing has reached the level of the Mage, your secret is safe with us.”

“Has Nicodemus been talking?” Baz asked.

“Not as much as your dear sister,” the older vampire muttered.

Leila lifted a hand in warning towards him.

“That’s enough bickering, I think. Let’s get down to business.”

“What is it that you want?” Snow asked.

Leila stepped forward and trailed a finger down Snow’s face.

“For you to swear that, given the opportunity, you will make sure the Mage is killed,” Leila said.

“That’s impossible,” Baz said, “It would be treason for him to kill him. Not to mention patricide.”

“Patricide? Now, that makes it even more exciting,” Leila said excitedly.

“I can’t just kill him…not only does it go against my beliefs, it will also send me to jail. But, I will promise to take him out of power,” Snow said.

Leila smiled, her blood-drenched chin shifting eerily.

“And should the Mage try to kill you or your friends before you accomplish that?”

“Then I will kill him myself,” Snow said.

Leila nodded.

“That is enough for me.”

“Now,” Snow said, “What am I getting in return for this?”

Leila snapped her fingers, prompting heavily tattooed vampire to step forward and hand her a document.

“The vampires responsible for the Watford Tragedy have been dead for a very long time. But, as those vampires knew their deaths were most likely inevitable, they made sure to document their deal with the Mage on paper. Our clan hasn’t been touched because of it.”

Snow took the paper and read it. His eyes widened as he got to the bottom of it.

“Merlin,” Snow whispered.

“His name is signed in his own blood and the document is bound by Dark magic, magic that he performed. If that isn't damning I don’t know what is,” Leila said.

“If this document has been protecting you, why do you want the Mage out of the way?” Baz asked.

“We don’t like our safety dependent on the whims of a power hungry murderer,” Leila said.

“Thank you for this,” Snow said, genuine gratitude in his voice.

“Before you go,” Leila began, voice sickeningly sweet, “I think it would be a good idea to seal the deal, so to speak.”

“What do you mean?” Baz asked.

“I mean, I want reassurance that Mr. Snow plans to keep his end of the deal.”

Snow glared at her.

“I am not signing a Dark contract,” He said.

“And I would never ask you to,” Leila said, “No, I had a blood promise in mind instead.”

“You’ll turn him,” Baz said.

“Maybe, but not everyone is as lucky as you are love,” Leila said, eyes fixed on Baz.

Baz flinched but didn’t protest the statement. At this point it seemed silly to act as if Snow didn’t already know he was a vampire.

“But, that isn’t what I meant. Mr. Snow, am I right to assume that you’re attached to this young man?”

“Yes,” Snow said, avoiding Baz’s eyes.

“Then a blood promise between the two of us will suffice,” Leila said.

Baz watched as Leila cut open her palm, revealing an almost black line of blood. She stepped forward and beckoned for Baz’s hand. Reluctantly, he put out the fire in his palm and extended his hand to her. She slashed the blade across his hand quickly and then grasped him in a firm handshake.

“I swear to give you damning evidence of the Mage’s involvement in the Watford Tragedy and to make sure your plans stay quiet,” Leila said.

Before Baz could speak, Snow stepped up behind him and placed his palm on Baz’s shoulder. Suddenly, he felt Snow’s magic pulse through him. He gasped at the content, so much stronger than it had felt the night before. Leila’s eyes also widened in surprise and she felt the shift in Baz’s blood.

“And I in turn swear to take the Mage out of power. If he should threaten to get in the way of that goal, I promise to do what is necessary, even to kill him,” Snow said.

“It is done,” Baz said.

Then Leila pulled away, gripping her hand and gasping.

“ _I felt you_ ,” She said, staring in wonder at Snow.

“Could you use it, my magic?” Snow asked.

She shook her head.

“No…it wasn’t in me. I could only feel it in his blood. You two…were connected. Somehow you became apart of the oath.”

Baz stepped back shakily.

“We need to leave, before they pull up the drawbridge,” Baz said.

“Yes we do,” Snow said, pulling his hood back over his head.

Leila looked between the two of them and then finally stared at Snow.

“So that’s why you’re helping Fiona Pitch,” She said, smiling dangerously at Snow.

Snow ignored her and turned around to leave. Baz followed him, but he could still hear the vampires as they made their way out of the Wavering Wood.

“The Chosen One has powers beyond what we’ve been told. And he chooses a vampire out of all the others…”

Baz tried to shut Leila and the others out as they made their way back to the Mummers House. The magic that Baz was able to tap into, he was sure that it wasn’t normal. He had never heard of any other mages being able to do anything like it. Snow shouldn’t be able to do it with anyone, period. But suddenly, Leila’s words clicked into place for him.

As they entered their room, Baz studied Snow. There was something about the rigid set of his shoulders and his closed off expression that told Baz that Snow was thinking about the exact same thing as him.

“Snow, can I ask you something?”

Snow paused, his back turned to him.

“Yes?”

“Sharing your magic…can you do that with anyone else?”

“No,” Snow said, voice taut.

“Have you, well, have you tried to with anyone else?”

Snow turned to look Baz in the eye levelly. His expression was neutral, not giving anything away. Baz got the impression that Snow was controlling himself more than he usually did.

“I tried it with Penny this morning,” He said.

“So it’s just me that it works with?” Baz asked.

“It’s just you,” Snow said, quietly.

Before Baz could say anything, before he could even think anything, Snow had picked up his pajamas and moved for the bathroom door.

“I’m going to take a shower, thanks for coming with me tonight.”

“Sure,” Baz mumbled.

Then the door slammed shut and Baz was alone in the room.


	15. Missed Opportunities

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope that you're all enjoying this fic still. It's probably the longest one I've ever written, which makes me a little nervous about it. This chapter is the set up for a much more complicated and *sigh* dramatic chapter I have planned. So I hope you like it and I can't wait to update with the next chapter ;)

Penny

Penny felt weird about going home for Christmas this year. Normally Simon would be headed off to Agatha’s and Penny could rest easy knowing the Wellbelove’s would do a decent enough job caring for him. But this year Simon was insistent on staying at Watford, according to a rather sulky Agatha at least. Penny didn’t blame Simon, spending the holidays with an ex, even if the ex was a friend, didn’t really sound like a good way to relax from school. Still, she didn’t want Simon alone at school the entire time.

Penny was lost in these thoughts, and not paying attention to her surroundings, when Baz plopped down across from her at the dining hall table. He looked like he hadn’t gotten much sleep, something that Penny couldn’t help but notice was becoming somewhat of a pattern for Baz as of the last couple of days.

“Penny, I was wondering if I could ask you something in confidence.” Baz said, not wasting any time on small talk or hellos.

“Uh, I guess that would be okay. I mean, it’s just that we aren't very close.”

She felt guilty for her discomfort but also felt she owed Baz some honesty. She didn’t dislike him or anything; in fact she was having quite a bit of fun hanging out with him lately. But she wasn’t sure that she was ready to be there for Baz in any kind of deeply emotional way. She sensed that whatever he was about to ask was of the personal variety.

“I know, I’m sorry it’s just…I don't know who else to ask,” Baz said, eyes pleading.

“What about Simon?”

“It's actually a question about him so, no I don’t think that would work,” He said.

Penny bit her lip nervously.

“Erm, okay, go for it.”

Baz looked down and away. He seemed very uncomfortable with what he was about to ask Penny, which in turn made her very anxious about how she would go about answering him.

“I um, well I was just wondering, has Snow ever dated anyone else besides Wellbelove?”

Penny frowned, unsure where he was going with his questions.

“No, just her.”

He nodded and then went silent again.

“Why would you ask me that Baz?”

Baz’s grey eyes shifted so that they focused on her chin, imperfectly mimicking eye contact.

“Uh, did he ever like anyone else?” He asked.

Penny felt her stomach dip. She wasn’t sure how much Baz knew, or why he was interested, but it became clear that Simon’s secrets were suddenly, uncomfortably, on the line. She blew out air that she had been holding in and shrugged.

“I mean…recently? I’m not the girl to ask. We’ve been so busy y’know? But before Agatha he never mentioned liking anyone, no.”

Baz worked his jaw a bit, his body language seeming to say that if he could find a way out of this conversation he would have, whatever the cost. Instead however, he closed his eyes briefly and then seemed to prepare himself to ask the biggest question yet.

“Do you know if Snow is uh, or like…do you know his preferences?” Baz asked.

“Excuse me?” Penny said, truly confused.

“Merlin Penny, do you know if he’s straight or not?” Baz asked, his cheeks ghostly pinkish.

Penny resisted the urge to drop her mouth open in complete awe. Tyrannus-Basilton Grimm Pitch asking after Simon Snow’s sexual preferences; Penny felt like making the day a national holiday.

“I mean, he doesn’t really like labels,” Penny said.

“So you don’t know,” Baz said.

“Oh, I _know_.”

Baz’s eyebrows raised in alarm.

“ _And so?_ ”

“And so…” Penny trailed off, “I know he likes both men and women. I don’t know more than that.”

Baz blinked a few times but otherwise didn’t respond.

“May I ask why you’re so interested?” Penny said.

Baz seemed to come back to life at her probing.

“Huh? Oh yeah, maybe later. I gotta go find Snow.”

Penny smiled.

“I bet you do.”

Baz ignored her. Then he was off, walking briskly out of the dining hall like a man with a purpose. Penny could only hope the purpose was the one she thought it was and that everything would work out. Both Baz and Simon deserved for things to work out.

Simon

Simon felt weird about going back to his room after everything that had happened the night before with Baz in the Wavering Wood. He got the impression that Baz was slowly coming to the realization that Simon had feelings for him, or at the very least knew he was attracted to him. He was pretty confident that, at this point in their tentatively forming friendship, Baz wouldn't be a _complete_ prick about the whole thing. But Baz also had a tendency to surprise him.

As he was walking back towards the Mummers House he felt a hand pull his shoulder back and found himself face to face with the Mage. _My father_ he thought. He didn’t look particularly pleased with Simon and he also didn’t seem to be pulling Simon aside for a quick chat about the weather. Simon tried to steel himself for whatever was about to occur between them.

“Yes sir?” Simon asked.

“You haven’t responded to any of my birds lately,” the Mage said.

“I know and I’m really sorry about that. It’s just…well, I’ve been a bit preoccupied.”

“With the Pitch boy?” the Mage asked.

“I’m sorry?” Simon asked.

“Don’t think I haven’t noticed you two hanging out around one another practically every minute of every day,” the Mage said, his tone flat.

“No I wasn’t trying to deny it I just was surprised that you brought it up.”

“He’s distracting you,” He said.

“He’s helping me actually, with my assignments,” Simon said.

“You hate him, you’ve always hated him,” the Mage said.

“Not…anymore. We’re friends now, or at least we’re trying to be,” Simon said.

The Mage narrowed his eyes.

“Don’t you think, given his family history, he’s a rather ill-advised friend to have?” He asked.

Simon had to hide the wave of anger that hit him. The fact that the Mage, his father, could stand there and act as if he wasn’t responsible for Baz’s mother’s death astounded him. He felt magic curl threateningly in his stomach at the thought.

“I thought you’d be happy about it actually. It means I’m keeping a closer eye on him,” Simon said.

The Mage frowned at that. Then he gave the idea his full consideration for a few minutes. Simon felt awkward as other students passed while the Mage, in his ridiculous costume, kept a hand on Simon’s shoulder without saying a word.

Finally, he spoke.

“I see, that was a very smart idea on your part. I hadn’t considered it before but in hindsight it seems obvious, doesn’t it? Well, keep on as you’ve been I suppose.”

Simon nodded and tried to break away but found himself prevented, once more, from continuing to his destination.

“But Simon…be careful. I know how you can get. Basilton is not an injured young man who you can save. He’s a dark creature, one whose Magical family isn’t much better than the vampires he actually belongs with.”

Simon nodded, unable to speak around his emotions.

“And besides, he’d never, well, I’m not sure what your intentions are. Or what your personal life looks like. But I could never really see someone like him ever thinking of you as more than just a casual friend,” the Mage said.

“Why do you think that?” Simon blurted.

“Because he comes from a pure line of Magical ancestry and you are, well you’re not a Normal obviously but you were raised as one for half of your life.”

“I see,” Simon said.

“Why don’t we speak in private soon? We need to go over the details of your disappearance and discuss some options for a problem that’s brewing with the Pitch family,” the Mage said.

“Will do,” Simon said.

Finally he was released from the death grip of his father and could continue to the Mummers house. Now though, he wasn’t so sure he wanted to go up to his room. If Baz knew how Simon felt then, he realized, what the Mage had said would most likely turn out to be true. Simon might be the most powerful mage the World of Mages had ever seen, but that still didn’t make him a match for Baz. He would never, ever be able to compete with the rich society boys Simon so often saw Baz flirt with. At the end of the day, Simon’s powers were the only amazing thing about him. In truth, if he ever managed to bring down the Mage, and the Humdrum and, hell, even the Goblins, he wouldn’t have anything left to go back to.

Baz had a future, one that Simon was hell bent on protecting. But for Simon, well, the only future he’d ever considered having was one where he ended up dead.

It was time, Simon thought, to put away his fantasies for good and focus on reality. Even if that reality was as desolate and dreary as the night terrors he couldn't ever escape from.


	16. Winter Confessions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, this is probably my favorite chapter I've written so far. There's still a lot more I have planned for this fic btw, but I hope you like this chapter as much as I did. Also, for those of you that are interested, music is a big part of my writing. When I came up with this chapter I was listening to Shark by Oh Wonder.

Baz

Baz felt nervous in a way he hadn’t since fifth year. He was searching for Snow around Watford but he was nowhere to be found. Baz didn’t want to go back to the room yet, to have to do this in _their_ room. He needed to find Snow somewhere in public, to have a crowd of people to diffuse whatever was going to happen. If he went back to the room and found Snow there, alone, well he wasn’t sure what the hell might happen.

He was acting stupid and reckless; even he could admit that to himself. And yet he felt almost certain that there was something going on for Snow, that maybe he was attracted to Baz. A million little pieces had clicked together after his experience in the Wavering Wood: Wellbelove’s jealously, Snow’s insistence on keeping him safe, the weird secrets nobody seemed to talk about, the memories, and, most importantly, the way that Snow sometimes looked at him. He felt stupid for not noticing it before. He felt even more stupid for looking for Snow to ask him about it. Because if he was wrong then there was no way he would ever live it down. Snow might have been acting nicer to him lately but that didn’t mean he was above embarrassing Baz with this little experiment for life.

Lost in his thoughts, he almost missed Wellbelove rounding the corner in the hallway.

“Hey Wellbelove!”

She nodded at him, not happily but at the very least not angrily either.

“Hey, why aren’t you in the dining hall for dinner?” She asked.

“I’m looking for Snow. Actually, I’ve been looking for him all day.”

She frowned.

“Yeah he’s been in an off mood. I saw him talk to the Mage earlier and ever since then he’s been sorta quiet.”

Baz paused.

“You’ve been with him this whole time?” Baz asked.

“Uh, yeah I guess. We were finishing up a school assignment.”

Baz looked down.

“Are you guys back together?” He asked.

She made a face at him, eyebrows raised.

“No. Why would you want to know?” She asked.

Baz shook his head.

“I-It’s nothing, really. Can you just tell me where he is?” Baz asked.

She studied Baz for a moment and suddenly he felt like his thoughts were utterly transparent to her. He watched as she bit her lip and he knew she was debating whether or not to lie to him. There was a part of her, Baz sensed, that didn’t want this conversation to happen between him and Snow. Finally, shoulders sagging, she sighed and gave in.

“Last I saw he was walking over the drawbridge, which is weird since they’ll be pulling it up soon.”

He nodded.

“Okay, yeah, thanks,” He said.

As he walked away from her, he heard her clear her throat.

“Baz? Just…try to understand. He’s been through so much already, I hope you don’t make it worse.”

He frowned but didn’t turn around to respond. In truth, he wasn’t sure what he was going to do. He couldn’t even begin to sort through his own feelings until he was sure about Snow’s. And if it turned out to be true? That Snow had feelings for him? Baz had no way of knowing what he’d do next.

Simon

It was cold out, snow sucking any of the heat that Simon’s uniform would normally offer. He didn’t really mind it much, not when there were more pressing matters crowding to get attention in his mind.

He was sitting on a rock near the drawbridge, fully aware that they might pull it up before he made his way back on to campus. He didn’t want to go back to his room, to look at Baz and know that, beyond a few pleasant conversations and a shaky acquaintanceship, there was no way forward for them. He couldn’t avoid Baz forever but he hoped he could find a way to deal with the truth before he came back and had to face him.

Someone’s crunching footsteps came from behind Simon. At first, he didn’t take note of it. Plenty of students liked to sneak off after dinner and play around in the dark. But then the footsteps stopped just a few paces behind him.

He turned and found himself face to face with the person he wanted to see most in the world and the one person he’d been avoiding all day.

“Baz,” He said.

Baz frowned.

“Why are you standing in the snow?” He asked.

“Just thinking,” Simon said.

“About freezing to death?” Baz asked.

Simon looked away.

“I kind of came out here to be alone actually.”

“Can’t you do that somewhere warmer?” Baz asked.

Simon sighed.

“What do you want Baz?”

Baz looked in the direction of the Wavering Wood.

“Have you talked to Penny yet?” Baz asked.

“No,” Simon said, “I’ve been with Agatha most of the day. Why?”

Baz kicked at a chunk of snow.

“I just, is there something you’re not telling me Snow?”

Simon shrugged.

“I don’t think it’s important Baz. Just leave it.”

“I know that things aren’t what I used to think they were between us. I know that you don’t hate me, that we have some kind of connection with your magic,” Baz said.

Simon stayed silent.

“I know that I’m in a lot of your best memories…” Baz trailed off.

“And so?” Simon asked, his chest tight.

“And so… _I know_ ,” Baz said, the last part almost as low as a whisper.

Simon stared at him, eyes wide and hands shaking.

“At least, I think I know,” Baz mumbled.

Simon cursed. This was not how he wanted to do this. When he’d imagined telling Baz about his feelings it had always been on his own terms, when he was ready to deal with the consequences. There was no room for preparation now and he certainly didn’t feel ready to open up. But Baz was right on the verge, was asking Simon to admit to… _something_. Whether Baz was aware of it or not, he was asking Simon to lay everything on the line for him.

“And if I tell you everything, what will that mean? Will things continue as they are?” Simon asked.

Baz bit his lip.

“I mean, I guess it depends on what you tell me,” Baz said.

“So, what, I’m just supposed to risk everything? Your safety, our alliance, and my own feelings?”

Baz took a step forward.

“Why do you have anything to risk in the first place?” 

Simon shook his head.

“Baz don’t.”

He watched nervously as Baz took another step forward.

“Snow just tell me, I promise I won’t get angry or ditch you and the girls. I just…”

He took another step forward.

“ _Don’t_.” Simon said.

“I think I deserve to know the truth,” Baz said.

Simon laughed bitterly. “The truth? You think you deserve it? _Of course you do_.”

“Then why aren’t you telling me?” Baz asked.

They were too close together. Simon’s breathing had spiked and he was having flashes of a million different memories. Some of them of Baz and all the fights they’d ever had and others of the time he’d spent being tortured. It was all just too much.

“ _Because the truth will ruin everything_ ,” Simon said, almost yelling.

“Just tell me! Why can’t you do this?” Baz asked, his voice strained.

Simon felt tears threatening. “Because Baz, nothing good can come from this. There is absolutely nothing that me admitting to this…this thing is going to do except fuck everything up!”

Baz shook his head.

“You don’t know that,” He whispered.

“Oh I don’t?” Simon asked.

“No, no you don’t,” Baz said.

“I know that you can't even call me by my real name,” Simon said.

Baz’s face contorted.

“It’s not like that,” Baz said.

“I know,” Simon said, his voice shaky, “That for years you thought of me as less than human, and for what? Because I was raised by Normals? Because I grew up in children’s homes?”

Baz shook his head.

“I never believed any of that shit! Snow I’m sorry, I’m so fucking sorry for all the elitist and prejudicial bullshit I’ve ever said. But you need to know that I-I don’t really think that stuff.”

Simon wiped a hand over his face. He couldn’t do this, couldn’t handle what was happening. There was too much in his heart, it would drown Baz. It didn’t matter how nice Baz was about the whole thing or how gently he rejected him; Simon knew his heart would get broken by the end of all this and that Baz would never live down the guilt.

“You’re asking me to risk everything just to get heartbroken,” Simon said.

Baz’s face creased anxiously.

“Heartbroken?” He said.

“ _Merlin yes!_ ” Simon said.

He turned and walked a few paces away from Baz.

“You want the truth?” He asked.

“Yes,” Baz whispered.

“I’m in love with you Baz,” Simon said.

He watched, pain wrenching through him, as Baz’s entire body froze.

“I’m in love with you and I’ve been in love with you for years,” Simon said.

“Snow…” Baz said.

“So why don’t you tell me how this…admission isn’t going to screw things up?”

Baz blinked, looking as if he were trying to think through a fog.

“I’m going for a walk,” Simon said.

“No! Wait-“

“I need to get away,” Simon said, already turning away and leaving.

He managed to get a few paces before Baz had grabbed his sleeve and wrenched him back around to face him. His face was wild; grey eyes dilated and mouth red as blood. Emotion had brought everything to the surface of Baz’s face and Simon couldn’t look away.

“You…you _just_ tell me you love me, that you’ve been in love with me for years and you don’t even give me a minute to absorb that before you give up?” Baz asked.

Simon clenched his jaw, anger and embarrassment coursing through him.

“I didn’t give up, all right? I just needed some space,” Simon said.

Baz shook his head.

“Well you know I don’t think that’s going to happen. Because you’ve had plenty of time for that considering you waited until now to tell me all of this.”

Simon made a noise of disbelief.

“Are you seriously getting on me for not telling you this before? As if I could?”

Baz dropped his hand from Simon’s sleeve.

“You should’ve told me,” Baz said.

“And why is that?” Simon asked, voice mocking.

“Because I never thought it was possible!” Baz yelled.

Suddenly they both became silent in the swirling wind. Simon felt, for the first time, that this conversation was not just about him. There was pain in Baz’s eyes, pain that Simon was sure he was somehow responsible for. They stood there in the cold night air as the drawbridge was pulled up behind them.

“I didn’t think it was possible for someone who….knew about me, about what I am to love me.”

“Your family loves you,” Simon said.

Baz winced.

“They do, but only because of what I used to be. Nobody who has met me after the change has ever said they loved me.”

“Baz,” Simon said, unsure what to say.

“Not until you. And now you won’t even let me have this.”

Simon felt his magic bubbling under the surface.

“Do you think I want it to be like this? Baz do you…I know you can’t feel the way I feel,” Simon said.

“You don’t know that,” Baz said.

“Do you love me?” Simon asked, point blank.

Baz’s eyes widened.

“I…I don’t know,” He said.

“So then where does that leave us?”

Baz’s cheeks lit to a subtle pink.

“I do like you though, I know that much. And I’m pretty sure…if you just let us figure this out I know that I could love you.”

Simon wanted to let it happen. It was like everything that he’d ever wanted was being dangled right in front of him and all he needed to do was grab it. But there were other things, darker things, that lurked behind everything else. Simon wasn’t sure he could just forget about all of that.

“What about your family Baz? Your father tortured me. I doubt he’d want to see us together.”

“He doesn’t approve of me dating guys period, so how does that even matter?” Baz asked.

“What about the fact that we stand on two different sides? The fact that the Old Families want to keep people like my friends out of Watford because of power?” Simon asked.

“We can figure something out, I promise,” Baz said.

“What about the fact that my father killed your mother?” Simon asked.

Baz’s face fell.

This whole thing was a mess, _they_ were a mess, and there was no getting around it.

“We might not even live to see graduation,” Simon whispered.

“So we’re just going to pretend like we don’t feel this way?” Baz asked, “And because of what? Some politics and a murderer that we both hate?”

Simon felt himself slipping, felt the weight of all his feelings crash down like waves and bury the doubts that kept trying to stop him from doing what he wanted.

“Baz I don know…”

Baz put his hand on Simon’s chest.

“I should’ve figured it out sooner…your heart always beats faster when I get close to you,” He said.

Simon felt the waves crash inside him and pull him deeper.

“Simon…” Baz whispered.

And then he went under.

He kissed Baz. He kissed him like he’d wanted to since they were fifteen and he couldn’t stop looking at the curve of Baz’s neck or the cool grey of his eyes. He kissed him like it was his only chance, as if he might wake up and realize that none of this had ever happened. He kissed him harsh, he kissed him fast, he _kissed him_.

Baz stood still for a moment. Simon wanted to ask him, to know what was wrong. But then Baz was kissing him back and Simon found he couldn’t actually form a sentence, even in his head.


	17. The Calm After the Storm

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just want to say that all of the comments on the last chapter made me feel so incredibly happy. I cannot tell you all how much it means to me that all of you are still reading and enjoying this fic. I hope you like this chapter. I wanted to give Simon and Baz a moment to just take it all in and get to be closer before they're forced back into action. Glad to be updating again <3

Baz

It felt strange, his first kiss. It was nothing like he’d ever expected it to be. When he’d dreamt about faceless boys in the dark of his room at night it was always hot and gasping, fingers sliding recklessly to places he’d never been touched before. This kiss, it wasn’t like that. It was the tenderest thing he’d ever felt, like Simon’s lips were trying to open him up, not consume him. He froze because he wasn’t sure what to do with this newfound intimacy, because he wasn’t really sure what to do with Simon, and mostly because he wasn’t sure how to kiss him back.

Finally it became too much and he just did what he felt worked. He pushed back against Simon’s mouth with his own and enjoyed the shuddered response he got from it. Simon’s hands slid up from his jacket to his throat where they rested for a moment. It was a shocking sensation and Baz found he was dizzy for a moment. His hands didn’t stop there though; instead they slid higher onto Baz’s cheeks and into his hair.

Baz felt his mouth open almost involuntarily at the sensation of Simon’s fingers pushing through his hair. He felt the shy touch of Simon’s tongue, as if he understood that Baz might not be comfortable taking the kiss to this level. Baz murmured encouragingly and pulled at Simon’s waist, deepening the kiss even though he had no idea what he was doing.

Tongues slid confusingly against one another, teeth clacked together in their desperation. Baz felt his own knees starting to buckle; whether from the temperature or the kissing, he wasn’t sure.

At some point Simon pulled away.

“We need to find a way back inside,” He whispered.

Baz closed his eyes and ran his nose down the length of Simon’s incredibly warm neck. He could smell his blood, could taste Simon’s adrenaline on his tongue. It felt overwhelming, the desire to memorize every inch of Simon with his vampire senses. But he could also sense the chilling of Simon’s body temperature and the irregularities in his heartbeat. He was slowly freezing.

“You just had to pick this place to get away from me,” Baz mumbled.

“Yes well, it obviously didn’t work.”

“Exactly, so you should have hid somewhere warmer since it was a doomed idea from the start.”

In truth, Baz wasn’t sure how they would be able to get back inside without summoning the Mage. But, considering Simon’s previous engagement in a self-proclaimed pity party after having seen him, he wasn't too keen on inviting the Mage down to join their first romantic encounter.

“Baz I really need to get inside,” Simon said.

“I know you do.” 

Simon shuddered, this time from the cold.

“Know any spells?” Simon said through clenched teeth.

“None are coming to mind. However…”

Baz lit a flame in his hand.

Simon’s eyes widened and he jumped backward. Then, after recovering from the shock, he rushed forward and anxiously touched Baz’s hand, panic in his eyes.

_"Put it out! What are you thinking?"_

Baz laughed but did as Simon asked, snuffing the flame instantly.

“C’mon, it’ll keep you warm.”

“It will burn you alive,” Simon said, eyes squinted angrily.

“It’s perfectly safe, I do it all the time.”

“Well you shouldn’t,” Simon grumbled.

Baz frowned as he realized he understood exactly how Simon was feeling. While Simon was terrified of Baz burning himself to death in an instant, Baz was similarly anxious about him freezing to death.

“This is quickly turning into a blizzard,” Baz said.

“I noticed,” Simon said, his body tense.

“I think I can get us back if you let me use some of your magic,” Baz said.

Simon nodded and stretched his hand out. Baz took it and felt instantly the change in his own power. Suddenly he had access to the entire universe, as if he’d dipped his fingers into several dimensions at once. Trying to focus, he shook his head until he could once again see his surroundings clearly.

 **“There’s no place like home,”** Baz said.

Suddenly he felt thrown and jerked, his stomach clenching and turning over uncomfortably. Everything around him was a blur, and though he could still feel Simon’s hand, he could no longer see him. Then, he felt himself thrown violently to the ground.

Distantly, he heard Simon groan.

“ _Jesus Christ_ …”

“Swearing like a normal again are we?” Baz asked, voice breathless.

Simon helped him up.

Somehow they were back in their room. Baz hadn’t meant to teleport them, he’d only meant to get them safely across the moat. It had been Simon’s magic that had allowed them to achieve something so drastic. He turned to stare at Simon in wonder.

“You are truly fucking amazing,” Baz said.

Simon’s cheeks reddened. It made Baz’s own stomach flutter excitedly. Without missing a beat, Baz strode forward and kissed Simon.

It felt different this time. Considerably more comfortable in the warmth and solitude of their bedroom, but also more intense. There was nothing to stop them in their room, no one to interrupt them and tell them to stop messing around outside of campus after curfew. They could do whatever they wanted in their room and though Baz’s rational side told him to take it slow, his body had other things in mind.

Simon made a noise of surprise but let himself be pushed against the wall. Baz knew his fangs might unsheathe at any moment, knew that it would be pretty stupid to continue if they did, but he couldn’t find a reason to care. Simon unbuttoned Baz’s shirt but didn’t take it off completely. Instead, he slid his fingers onto Baz’s collarbone. In that moment Baz wasn’t sure what he did with his mouth, or his voice, or even his body. All he knew was that he _felt_.

He must have done something though, because he felt Simon’s magic surge and pour into him for a moment. Without warning, Simon broke away from the kiss.

“Baz…we should, we need to talk,” Simon said, breathing heavily.

“This seems more fun,” Baz murmured.

“I know but…”

Baz listened in amusement as Simon trailed off while he began kissing Simon’s neck. He needed to be careful, it was the most dangerous place for Baz to be testing his self control but it was also one of the most tempting. Gently he dragged his teeth across the surface, careful not to break the skin. Simon sighed, breath hissing out of him loudly.

“Baz we really do need to talk and I…I’m not really sure I want to go further yet.”

Baz pulled away, a little nervous about what he might see in Simon’s expression.

“Am I…well, am I bad at this?” Baz asked.

Simon’s eyebrows scrunched together in confusion.

“Wait, what?” Simon asked.

“Well, I mean, I haven’t exactly done this before so I just wondered if I was doing it wrong, or something,” Baz said, refusing to look at Simon.

“I’m your first kiss?” Simon asked.

Baz glanced back up and noticed that Simon was looking at him with open surprise.

“Um, yeah I guess,” Baz said.

Simon shook his head.

“Okay, well, first of all, you weren’t doing it wrong. You were doing amazing.”

“And second of all?” Baz asked.

“I thought…I’ve seen you flirt with other guys.”

“Flirt yes, do this? Not so much,” Baz said.

“Why didn’t you?” Simon asked.

“I just, I don’t know. I guess I didn’t want some random hookup in the Wavering Wood. I wanted a relationship and none of the guys I liked ever did.”

“Until now,” Simon said.

“Is that what you want, a relationship?” Baz asked.

Simon stroked Baz’s face lightly.

“Of course,” He said.

“So why don’t you want to take this further then?” Baz asked.

“Because I want to take our time…to figure out what we’re going to do before we jump right into things.“

Baz nodded.

“That’s reasonable, I guess.”

Simon smiled.

“Is it really?” He asked.

Baz pulled Simon into his arms and listened as their hearts slowed down. It felt nice just to hold each other, he realized.

“Yes, but can I ask for one thing?” Baz said.

“Of course,” Simon said.

“Just…sleep with me tonight. Not like _that_ but you know…you’ve waited so long for this. And I, well, I never even thought this was possible for me.”

Simon bit his lip.

“Please. I want to wake up tomorrow with you next to me, not across from me.”

“All right,” Simon said.

After stripping out of their snow drenched clothes and hastily throwing on their pajamas, the two of them slid into Baz’s bed. For a second, Baz considered pushing both of their beds together but then he realized it would look pretty ridiculous and settled for the limited space of one bed.

“We could spell it bigger,” Simon suggested.

“Do you even know a spell that would work?” Baz asked.

“I imagine a lewd innuendo would do the trick,” Simon said, voice thick with amusement.

“Shut up and let me sleep,” Baz said, laughing in spite of himself.

Simon pulled Baz closer and rested his cheek into the curve of Baz’s neck. Baz felt warm, warmer than he’d ever thought possible since he’d been turned. He spelled the lights off quietly and then snuggled closer.

“Goodnight Baz,” Simon whispered.

“Goodnight…Simon,” Baz whispered.

There were things they needed to talk about, things to work out that would be difficult and complicated. But for now, it was just the two of them in each other’s arms. The rest could wait for morning.


	18. Aftermath

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OMG I'M SO SORRY FOR NOT UPDATING FOR SO LONG!!! D': I was super busy with school work and just going through and altogether stressful time so I wasn't able to write. I am finally on summer break though so I should be able to update more frequently. Thank you so much for continuing to be patient with me. I hope you all enjoy <3

Simon

Simon murmured happily as he stretched his limbs, his brain feeling fuzzy in the morning light. Blinking awake, he realized he wasn’t alone. Baz was curled in his arms, almost catlike, with a slight flush in his cheeks. Simon smiled and pulled Baz against him tighter, enjoying the sound of pleasure Baz made.

“Good morning darling,” Simon whispered, kissing Baz’s cheek.

“Hm,” Baz said.

Simon kissed Baz’s mouth and enjoyed the sensation as Baz slowly came to life under his lips. After a minute or so of kissing, Baz pulled at Simon’s hips and whipped him up on top of him.

“Whoa,” Simon said.

“Vampire benefits,” Baz smiled.

Simon leaned forward, pinning Baz to the bed, and kissed him again. He felt as the kiss shifted from a good morning nuzzle to something more. Their breathing got louder, mingling until Simon wasn’t sure who was breathing the loudest. He felt like he did before he was about to go off, slightly off kilter and dizzy. Simon made a noise of disappointment when Baz broke off the kiss.

“Shit,” Baz said, glancing at his nightstand.

Simon pushed off of Baz and watched him jump out of bed.

“What is it?” Simon asked.

“We are so late, we’ve missed our morning classes,” Baz said.

“So?” Simon asked.

“So if we don’t show up for the rest of them, the girls will come looking for us,” Baz said.

Simon laughed but stood up.

“Fine, we won’t ditch the rest of our classes,” Simon said.

They dressed quickly, Simon laughing the whole time at Baz’s panicking. Soon they were out the door and running to make it to class.

When they stepped into potions class, Simon looked away as Baz’s face pinked. It was clear that while nobody knew what was actually going on between the two of them, that Baz thought they knew. Simon hurried to his seat beside Agatha and kept his eyes off of Baz for the rest of class.

He was sure he was imagining it, but it seemed like Baz was embarrassed by the idea of people knowing they were seeing each other. If they _were_ even seeing each other Simon realized. They had never actually gotten to that part of the conversation the night before.

It wasn’t exactly a secret that Baz was gay. He frequently flirted with guys for the fun of it and even took a sixth year named James to the last spring formal. But Simon had the feeling this would be different, a lot more intense of an announcement than any flirting or date could have been. They would be an official couple and they were famous for being the most dangerous school rival in history.

He tried to focus on how amazing the morning had been, on how happy Baz had been when he’d woken up to Simon’s kiss. He knew his face was scrunched up with concern, could feel Agatha’s worried gaze on him, but he couldn’t help it. Now that he knew what it was like to be with Baz he was terrified to lose him.

After class ended Simon, Baz, and Agatha walked together to meet Penny in the dining hall. Simon resisted the urge to grab Baz’s hand and bit his lip to stop himself from asking if everything was okay.

“Hey Baz, did you find Simon yesterday?” Agatha asked.

“What?” Baz asked.

Simon felt his heart drop as he took in Baz’s ashen expression. He seemed totally and completely freaked out by the idea that Agatha might have caught on to them.

“Um, remember you asked me if I’d seen him because you had to talk to him? I was just checking in to see if you found him,” Agatha said.

“Yeah, he did,” Simon said, avoiding Baz’s gaze.

“Oh, so uh, how did that go?” She asked.

Simon opened his mouth to speak but was cut off by Baz.

“Fine. Was just checking in on him about the Mage,” Baz said.

Agatha nodded, her face looking confused.

“Oh, okay.”

They walked in silence the rest of the way to the dining hall. When they got there Simon stopped and grabbed Baz’s sleeve, trying to communicate what he couldn’t say out loud with his eyes.

“Can I talk to you alone for a second?” Simon asked.

Baz ripped his arm out of Simon’s hand but didn’t walk away.

“Sure,” Baz said.

Agatha glanced between the two of them and shrugged.

“Whatever, see you in there.”

Simon watched as Agatha walked in and then turned to face Baz.

“Why are you acting like this?” Simon asked.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Baz said.

Simon huffed angrily.

“You’ve been acting freaked out ever since we left the room. Like we have a sign written on us that says ‘We slept in the same bed last night.’”

Baz clenched his jaw and refused to look Simon in eye.

“What’s your point?” Baz asked.

Simon shook his head in disbelief.

“Am I hallucinating? Or did last night never happen?” Simon asked.

“I can’t deal with this right now,” Baz snapped.

Then he stormed inside, leaving Simon completely alone.

Simon felt his legs shaking and his heart pounding. He had no idea how but he had somehow messed everything up. He couldn’t follow Baz into the dining hall, couldn’t face his friends like he was. So instead, he walked away.

Baz

Baz tapped his foot nervously and waited for Simon to come back into the dining hall. He knew he was acting like a prick, but it wasn’t because of anything Simon did. He was just nervous about everyone finding out about them and had no clue what to do about it. Baz was afraid of how people might react. But he couldn’t talk to Simon about it because Simon would just threaten everyone during breakfast with his sword and Baz certainly wasn’t letting _that_ happen.

“Um, where did Simon go?” Bunce asked.

Baz frowned, feeling uneasy.

“He was right behind me,” Baz said.

“Did you two get into a fight or something?” Wellbelove asked, an edge to her voice.

“I don’t think so…” Baz said.

He was rethinking the whole conversation, wondering if he had missed something. He hadn’t called Simon any mean names, hadn’t told him to fuck off or leave him alone. All things considered, he had been pretty well behaved by Pitch standards. But Simon was different, Baz realized. Simon, like with his magic, felt so much _more_ than everyone else did.

“I need to go,” Baz said.

“Before you go, mind filling us in on, oh I don’t know, _something?_ ” Bunce asked.

“Yeah Baz, we’ve kinda been behind on this whole take down the Mage plan. We have Nico’s testimony, your sister’s testimony, a _signed_ document from the vampires. I mean, isn't it time to make a move?” Wellbelove asked.

Baz shook his head.

“I know but I need to go. We’ll talk about it tomorrow at breakfast. I promise,” Baz said.

Without another word Baz ran out of the dining hall and rushed towards his room.

He had a bad feeling about Simon and he was afraid of what he might have done. _I should’ve been more patient with him_ he thought angrily.

Once he reached the final step to their room he felt himself pass through a dizzy wall of magic.

“Merlin,” Baz whispered.

He entered the room and felt his legs buckle from the wave of magic he stepped through.

Simon was on his bed, face covered by his hands. Baz knew it wasn’t a good idea to say anything with Simon in this state. He worried that the wrong set of words might set him off and obliterate the room completely. Instead, he walked carefully over to the bed, climbed on, and gently wrapped his arms around Simon.

“Hey, Simon, what’s wrong?” Baz asked quietly.

Simon shook his head, refusing to speak.

“I’m sorry okay? Whatever I did, well I’m a stupid, emotionally dysfunctional prat and I’m sorry.”

Simon turned, his face red from tears.

“I just…I don’t want to lose you,” Simon said, voice croaking.

Baz frowned in confusion and touched Simon’s face.

“What made you think you were losing me?” Baz asked.

Simon’s eyebrows knitted together.

“Because of what you said earlier…” Simon said.

Baz felt like kicking himself. In retrospect he could see exactly how Simon would have misinterpreted him. All of a sudden Simon’s devastated reaction to his behavior from the morning clicked into place.

“I wasn’t…it’s not what I was trying to say,” Baz said.

“Then what was wrong?” Simon asked.

Baz shrugged and looked down; suddenly worried he might be the one to start crying.

“It’s just…everyone loves you. You’re the chosen one, the school hero, blonde curls and adorable freckles. I’m…well I’m a Pitch, everyone will look at me and think ‘What is Simon thinking?’” Baz said.

Simon stroked Baz’s face.

“Plenty of people look up to you. Hell, even Penny is trying to compete with you for best grades,” Simon said.

“And then there’s that,” Baz said, “With Penny and Agatha. I don’t know if they’ll ever think I’m good enough for you.”

“They will because I’ll tell them you are, they’ll trust my judgment,” Simon said.

“You’ll always be the hero to them and I-I’m always going to be the villain.”

Simon’s eyes widened, two small blue oceans.

“Baz,” Simon said.

Baz felt a tear slide down his face.

“Don’t try to tell me I'm wrong,” Baz said.

Simon leaned forward and kissed Baz’s face.

“When your father was torturing me- “

“ _Please don’t_ ,” Baz said.

“I thought I might die, that I would never be able to return to Watford. But that didn’t happen,” Simon said.

Baz looked at him, his emotions swirling like a kaleidoscope of pain and affection and desire.

“It didn’t happen because I kept thinking of you. Of how much I loved you and how I could never let myself die if you were still out there waiting for me to come back to Watford,” Simon said.

“I wanted you to come back so we could go back to fighting,” Baz whispered.

“I don’t care,” Simon said.

“Simon,” Baz said, his throat swelling.

“You saved me,” Simon said.

Baz froze.

“You could never be the villain. Not in my story,” Simon said.

Baz crushed himself to Simon, kissing him with enough ferocity to bruise. He was crying but he couldn’t stop kissing him, couldn’t stop his body from shaking as Simon’s hands came up to grip his back. He was grasping at Simon’s stomach, leaving marks in his desperation to get closer. And Simon was meeting him all the way, kissing him like he knew that Baz was bleeding inside. He had been in pain for so long and finally, _finally_ someone had told him he was more than just a weapon against Simon. He was someone worthy of being loved, someone who could save Simon instead of destroy him.

Between kisses Simon said Baz’s name, his voice awestruck.

Baz felt himself shift, felt all his feelings increase by tenfold. He’d always been attracted to Simon he realized. And he’d liked him for a while now if he had to be honest with himself. But this was different. He felt the desire to push his soul into Simon’s, to show him exactly how much it meant to him that Simon loved him as much as he did.

_I love him_ Baz realized.

“Please by my boyfriend Baz,” Simon whispered.

_I love him as endlessly as his magic is infinite._

“Okay, I’ll be your boyfriend,” Baz whispered.

_Simon Snow is made of magic and I am made of love for him._


	19. The Beginning of the End

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jus so you all know, I love ravens despite their creepy symbolic meanings. That'll make more sense as you read the chapter, but I just wanted to put that out there. The title of this chapter is kinda literal in that we're getting closer to the end of this fic :') I have at least a few more chapters outlined, but not very many. And if you're worried that the humdrum won't make an appearance then don't worry, I like to save best for last lol. I hope you enjoy this chapter <3

Simon

They walked down the hall silently, neither one of them feeling the need to fill up the large stone walkway with sound. This was their school and if they wanted to walk while holding hands then they would do it. They hadn’t run into anyone yet but it didn’t matter. They were about to walk into the dining hall during breakfast, the busiest time of the day. They had decided together the night before that they were done lying to each other, done hiding themselves from their classmates, and done hurting each other.

Simon squeezed Baz’s hand reassuringly as they walked and took a deep breath before throwing the doors open.

He didn’t know what he had been expecting really, but he knew it had been a bit more than just a few curious glances from the people sitting nearest the door. There were no hushes of silence, horrified gasps or pointed fingers. It was just a normal morning as far as everyone else was concerned.

“I guess we are not the celebrities we thought we were,” Baz said, amusement in his voice.

“Uh…yeah,” Simon responded.

They walked over to their table unhurriedly now that they knew there would be no big fuss over their arrival. As they sat Simon watched as Agatha’s gaze zeroed in on their conjoined hands. Penny, on the other hand, had her nose stuck deep into a book with a title Simon couldn’t translate.

“So…” Agatha said.

“Should we kiss or do you need even more to take the hint Agatha?” Baz asked, obviously irritated.

Simon felt a surge of surprise that Baz had used her first name.

Penny’s face snapped up.

“What?” She asked, eyes quickly scanning the situation.

“It would appear that Simon and Baz are dating,” Agatha said stiffly.

“Oh,” Penny said, glancing at them, “Oh that, the holding hands. Are we surprised about this?”

Agatha’s expression became one of disbelief.

“Um yeah? Weren’t they just fighting like twenty-four hours ago?” Agatha said.

“Yes we’re together. And I’d love it if the both of you would be supportive of it,” Simon said, eyes on Agatha.

“Of course,” Penny said, smiling.

“Yeah,” Agatha said, avoiding looking anyone in the eye.

“So,” Baz said, “Why isn’t everyone staring at us?”

Penny laughed.

“It’s breakfast, nobody is even awake enough to gossip properly yet.”

“Besides,” Agatha said, looking at the whispering clusters next to them, “I don’t think everyone could see.”

“They sure can now,” Baz said, eyeing the table with heads bent over behind them.

“Let them,” Simon said, shrugging.

He would not let school gossip bring his mood down. He was dating the guy he’d been in love with for years; nothing was going to stop him from feeling high with happiness.

“Merlin, the Mage is coming towards us,” Agatha whispered, sounding terrified.

Nothing, except that.

Baz

The Mage drifted down the aisle with his gaze locked on Simon. It was not a friendly look and it made Baz’s vampire instincts kick in. There was something dangerous about the way that he approached Simon, like he was ready to strike at any moment. But the Mage’s Men were nowhere around, and it would be suicidal to attack Simon at full power alone.

He stopped right in front of them, bringing the entire hall’s attention to their small section of table.

“Simon, how are you this morning?” the Mage asked.

If Baz had thought Simon would look scared and respond timidly, then he would have been wrong. Simon stared back defiantly at the Mage, letting open dislike show in his eyes.

“Swell, thank you,” Simon said.

The Mage’s gaze flickered on everyone sitting with him. First he looked at Penny who smiled dangerously at him. Then his gaze shifted to Agatha, whose expression was stone cold and unreadable. He looked at Baz last, saving the most hatred and anger for him. Baz reacted against his will, jerking back from the fiery gaze of the man who was behind his mother’s murder.

“And you’re still hanging out with Basilton?” the Mage asked.

“We’re dating actually,” Simon clarified.

The Mage smiled coldly, putting his hand on Simon’s shoulder.

“Well, then I guess congratulations are in order,” the Mage said.

He lifted a pitcher of water and poured himself a cup. Then, with the eyes of the entire hall on him, he lifted the cup into the air.

“To Simon Snow and Basilton Grimm Pitch, may your budding relationship last many years to come,” the Mage said.

No one in the hall moved or said anything. The silence spoke to the underlying tension in the room, signifying that everyone could see how unhappy the Mage actually was. It was clear that he had just made his opinion on their relationship known to everyone in the hall at once.

“You know, as the Mage’s Heir, I knew you’d have to be inventive in how you battled the forces of evil. But I underestimated you Simon, you are far more creative than I had ever imagined,” the Mage said.

After that he stormed out of the hall.

There was a brief silence, so heavy the Baz wasn’t sure how it could ever break. But then Simon glared at the rest of the hall and stood up.

“Well? What are all of you staring at?” Simon asked.

The hall erupted with sound. Some were trying to answer Simon directly while others grabbed at the sleeves of their friends urgently to talk about what had just happened. Simon ignored them all and gave the girls a pointed look. All four of them stood and began to make their way to the door. Gareth hurried behind them, staring at Simon and Baz’s twined hands.

“Hey Si, does this mean your siding with the Old Families?”

“I am not siding with anyone,” Simon said.

Baz froze and turned to face him.

“Simon what are you doing?” Baz whispered, horrified.

Simon turned to face the rest of the room.

“I am not siding with anyone,” He yelled, “Not the Mage, not the Coven, and not the Old Families. Do you hear me? I’m sorry I couldn’t be your chosen."

They pushed into the hall ran through the halls. It wasn’t as if they were being chased but they knew they had to leave. They ran until they got to Simon and Baz’s room and burst through the door. Once they were behind it Simon threw himself against the door while Penny spelled it locked.

“Are they after us?” Agatha asked.

“I don't think so, not yet at least,” Simon said.

“Simon what the fuck were you thinking?” Baz asked, fear curling in his gut.

“What do you mean?”

Baz stared at him in disbelief.

He had just renounced his rights as the Mage’s Heir, had put his enrollment in Watford in jeopardy, almost outright declared war on the Mage and potentially the Coven, and announced it all in front of the entire school. He had just put himself entirely on the line.

“You may have just committed treason,” Baz said.

“I did what I had to,” Simon said.

“You can’t be serious,” Baz said.

“But he is,” Penny interrupted.

Baz swung to face her.

“Baz, Simon didn’t have another choice. Once the Mag publicly shunned Simon…well that was it. If he hadn’t said anything, if he’d let Gareth’s accusation stand we would all be in custody right now.”

“They couldn’t just assume he was in league with the Old Families,” Baz said.

“Yes they could have,” Agatha said, “Baz you and I both know how the social circles work. Dating is similar to marriage in the World of Mages. When you two became public well…some probably thought Simon was on your family’s side.”

“Especially after what the Mage said,” Penny added.

Baz dragged his hands through his hair, a nervous habit he’d picked up from Simon.

“Well we might still be arrested so what do we do?” Baz asked.

“Not we,” Simon said quietly.

“Excuse me?” Baz asked.

Simon’s expression was tired and a bit guilty, as if he were worried to say the next bit.

“Baz…” Simon trailed off.

“Tell me,” Baz said.

Simon clenched his jaw and looked away.

Baz was surprised that it was Agatha who broke the silence. She stepped forward and, with an uncharacteristic expression of sympathy, spoke.

“If Simon hadn’t said anything we all could have been branded as helping the Old Families. Not just because you're a Pitch but also because of Penny’s parent’s political stance and my dad’s position on the Coven.”

“I don't understand,” Baz said.

“My parent’s politics don’t line up with the Mage’s,” Penny said.

“And I would have been accused of manipulating my dad’s position on the Coven for the sake of the Old Families,” Agatha said.

“And you’re a Pitch,” Simon said.

“Can you get to the point?” Baz asked angrily.

“Simon said what he did because we were all in danger of being arrested,” Agatha said, “And by claiming no allegiance he’s cleared all of us.”

“Except for himself. Guys, he just publicly denounced the Mage and went back on his promise to fulfill the prophecy.”

“We know,” Penny whispered.

“I couldn’t save us all,” Simon said, sadness in his voice.

Baz stared at him.

“I think I need a moment alone with Simon,” He whispered.

“Where should we go? Are we safe?” Penny asked.

“Go home,” Simon said, “Take Agatha with you and tell your mom everything about the investigation we’ve done. Agatha, get your father to Penny’s house and tell him everything too. We have to act fast.”

Penny nodded.

She and Agatha took turns hugging Simon. Baz couldn’t help but feel angry with them for treating it like a last goodbye. It felt too much like they were giving up on him; as if they’d already accepted that this was the last time they would ever see Simon.

Then they hurried out the door and didn’t look back.

“Baz,” Simon began, “I-“

_“No,”_ Baz growled, _“You do not get to just sacrifice yourself.”_

Simon’s eyes widened.

“I don’t have much of a choice,” Simon said.

“Bullshit,” Baz spat, “You made a choice back there. Don’t try to convince me otherwise.”

Simon glared at him.

“You’re right. I made a choice. Should I have made a different one? Let the girls and you take the fall for a lie with me?”

Baz shook his head.

“That isn’t fair,” Baz said.

_“None of this is!”_ Simon yelled.

“I’m not going to let you do this on your own,” Baz said, “I’m going to stay with you. To fight this with you.”

“You can’t,” Simon said.

“And why not?” Baz asked.

Simon ran forward and put his arms around Baz. His mouth found Baz’s and pressed against him urgently. Baz had never been kissed like that, had never felt the mix of fear and burning desire that was pouring out of Simon. He made a noise and pushed his own hands into the softness of Simon’s curls. He was so angry with Simon, so fearful of what might happen to him and he wanted him so much. He felt himself tip onto one of their beds. Simon’s tongue was in his mouth, fusing them together and making Baz lose track of his thoughts. He ached with the need to get closer, to somehow find relief from the feeling curling in his abdomen. He pushed his hands underneath Simon’s shirt and hungrily smoothed down the skin of his chest and stomach. Simon shuddered against the touch and Baz felt as Simon’s mouth went a bit slack, as if he couldn’t absorb the touch without losing some control. Baz took control of the kiss and poured everything of himself into it. He just wanted everything to be okay, to be able to do this every single night for the rest of his life with Simon, to not have to worry that someone could take it away.

“Baz,” Simon gasped.

Baz moved down his chest, kissing every mole in his path. This was where he wanted to be, memorizing everything on Simon’s body, not worrying about treason or the Humdrum or anything else that might threaten them.

Simon threw his head back when Baz curled his tongue against the V of his hips.

“I always wondered if you tasted like your magic, it seems to pour out of you constantly,” Baz murmured.

Simon grabbed Baz’s face and kissed him, the sadness all but forgotten. His kiss was urgent in a different way now.

“Oh my god,” Simon whispered as he kissed down Baz’s throat sucking gently every now and then.

Baz fisted his hand in Simon’s hair.

“You taste like fire,” Simon whispered against Baz’s collarbone.

Baz lifted Simon’s face so they were eye to eye.

“Don’t do this alone,” Baz whispered desperately.

Simon’s eyes were wild with everything he wanted. The blue of them were a regular blue, Baz was sure he’d seen eyes like them a thousand times before. But there was something in them, a whip of energy that Baz was sure he’d never know with anyone else. If he could only ever look into one pair of eyes for the rest of his life, he was sure he’d be satisfied with Simon’s.

“I won’t,” Simon said.

Baz nodded.

Then he let go.

Simon

He woke up to a noise. Pushing a grumbling Baz off of him, he got up to investigate. There was a bird at the window, and not just any bird. A large raven sat at the sill, its black eyes unflinchingly staring back at him. He did not need the classical education Baz had had to know what it meant. With a shaking hand he opened the window and let the bird in.

It flew and landed on his arm, not making a squawk or a chirp like other messenger birds might have.

On its leg was a simple note. It read, ‘In my office. Now.’ Simon did not need to read the scrawled signature at the bottom to know who had signed it.

He knew he should wake Baz up and take him with him. But he couldn’t do it, couldn’t bear to lift his hand and shake him awake. He was going to break his newly made promise to him. The realization filled him with both hope and coldness. He only wished Baz wouldn’t hate him for it.

He leaned over and kissed Baz on the cheek lightly.

“I love you,” He whispered.

He couldn’t think of anything else he wanted to say and so he lifted from the bed and left the room, sword in hand.

The journey down the corridors was a quiet one. Simon didn’t mind it so much, in fact he appreciated that he wouldn’t be dragged by Mage’s Men and spat on the entire time. If it had to happen this way then he was glad it would be like this, on his own terms and without dramatic flare.

He stepped through the office that used to be Baz’s mother’s. He wondered if things would have been different with her here. And then he stopped as he realized that had she still been here he would never have been let into Watford. It didn’t bother him; it just made him realize that changing the past wouldn’t necessarily fix things, it would only change them indifferently. Perhaps it would have been better for Baz’s mother to be alive instead of Simon being able to go here, he would never really know. All he did know was that her death had been wrong, wrong in the worst kind of way. And his own father had been the one behind it all.

The Mage sat at his chair alone. It surprised Simon to realize that they were the only two in the room. He had expected the equivalent of a firing squad.

“Have you invited me here to die too? Or was Baz’s mother good enough,” Simon said.

“Well, good evening to you too,” the Mage said.

“I am not here to exchange pleasantries,” Simon said.

“Neither am I,” the Mage said, coldly.

They faced each other for a long moment. Simon tried, and failed, to find some sort of resemblance between the two of them. He could see nothing of his father in himself, even physically. It was as if his mother had held the key to his looks and had taken it with her to the grave.

“So Basilton told you what his lying mother said,” the Mage said.

It took Simon a moment to respond. He had hoped to only put himself in the line of danger but it appeared that he would not have what he wanted, even in the slightest. It came down to either lying and putting Baz in danger or telling the truth and damning Fiona. He hadn’t thought of sending a message to warn her and as soon as he told the truth the Mage would likely send men after her. She would be killed and Baz would be left with no one else to trust.

_You promised her you’d protect him._

He wondered why he’d ever thought he could have a happy life, how he ever thought he could protect everyone he cared about and still end up alive in the end. He should have never expected it after being born the son of a murderer.

“No, Baz didn’t tell me,” Simon said.

“Don’t lie to me. He’s the only one that could have told you,” the Mage snapped.

“Actually he isn’t. Natasha Pitch didn’t want to put her son in more danger than necessary.”

“And?” the Mage demanded.

“So she told her sister instead,” Simon said.

The Mage’s eyes narrowed. He swore as he stood up and paced the window.

“That bitch could never honor a deal. I can’t believe it,” the Mage said.

Simon felt a flicker of confusion.

“What are you talking about?” The Mage spun on him.

“I made a deal with Malcolm Grimm. He was supposed to keep you away from school! I thought Natasha would visit Basilton and I didn't want to risk you being there for it. I never guessed in a million years that it would be his own sister-in-law that would betray Malcolm and break you out.”

Simon took a step backward.

“It was _you._ Why would you do that to me? _You had me tortured._ ”

The Mage made a sound of disgust.

“Oh please Simon. I knew you could handle it. Malcolm promised he wouldn’t let you die and you’re the chosen one. I had to give him something worth making the deal.”

“How did you even get him to work with you?” Simon asked.

“I granted his family immunity. He would never need to worry about his children or his wife. What he didn’t realize is that the contract only concerned Grimms. Not Pitchs.”

“You are a disgusting excuse of a man,” Simon spat.

“Am I? Because I have to say Simon, I am surprised with you. I knew that you’d been drooling after the vampire spawn for years but I never thought you’d turn against me.”

_“You killed his mother,”_ Simon said.

“It was an accident! I never meant for anyone to get killed except for maybe a few children in the nursery, and that was a price I was willing to pay. I never dreamed Natasha would come in and sacrifice herself like that,” the Mage said.

“You don’t even feel guilty,” Simon said, horrified disbelief coloring his voice.

“Of course I don’t! She was a prejudiced and elitist bitch. You can’t tell me that you would have preferred her policies.”

“Of course I wouldn’t have! But I would have fought her head on in the courts of the Coven, made real legislation happen. I would never have murdered her! She had a child and a family and you took her away from them.”

“They are evil,” the Mage said.

“They are human,” Simon began, “They are flawed. But how could they have ever learned? You took the most beloved person of theirs away from them and persecuted them relentlessly. You made sure that they couldn’t change because you didn’t want them to. You wanted an excuse to finish what you started the day Natasha died.”

The Mage glared at him.

“All of this is besides the point,” the Mage said.

“Of course it is,” Simon whispered tiredly.

“I have the support of the Mage’s Men and most of the Coven. I could round you, your precious boyfriend, and those two girls you care for so dearly and have you all executed by morning.”

“Agatha’s father will never support that,” Simon said.

“Her father will be removed from the Coven by morning,” the Mage said.

Simon worked his jaw.

“What do you want?” He asked, fury burning through his blood.

“I want you to publicly admit your treasonous acts. That you acted alone and decided to take me down. You wanted more power, to be both the Mage and the chosen one. I will let you claim that your friends had nothing to do with this. And then you will relinquish your power to me.”

“Excuse me?” Simon asked.

“I’ve found a spell to do it. I can finally harness your power and take down the humdrum myself. If you survive the ritual, then I will have you imprisoned for the rest of your life.”

“Why not just kill me?” Simon asked.

“Because I made a promise long ago,” the Mage said, eyes far away for a moment.

“To my mother,” Simon said flatly.

The Mage looked startled.

“You know about that?”

Simon kneeled.

“Thank you, _father_ ,” Simon paused for a moment to let that sink in, “I am so grateful for your offer. I will do as you’ve said.”

**“Set in stone,”** the Mage said, voice shaking.

Simon couldn’t speak or move but he knew his eyes were burning with rage. This was not how he had wanted things to end, how he had ever expected to go out. The Mage swept out of the room, leaving him stuck on the floor.

He would not go without a fight, but he worried now that he would not be given the opportunity to do so.

Fiona

She felt strange staying in the Bunce’s living room. There had been a time when she knew Mitali would have spit on her for even thinking of coming through the threshold. But times had changed and Fiona could admit that maybe she and Natasha had gotten it wrong all along.

Fiona found that she actually liked Mitali. She hated the Mage too but for far less biased reasons than her and Natasha had. Mitali didn’t want magical creatures denied entry, or lower magic magicians to be denied teaching, but she didn’t think the Mage was handling it right either. She would make a great headmistress Fiona thought.

They were discussing how to make the move on the Mage when she felt a coolness settle around her. It reminded her of when Natasha had come to her. But the Visitings were over; it wasn’t possible.

“Lucy?” Mitali gasped, eyes wide.

“My son…he’s in trouble…Davy….he’s hurting him…” whispered a voice.

Fiona, one of a very select few that knew Simon’s family tree, felt her stomach drop with fear.

“He needs you…please…my rosebud boy…”

Then the coldness vanished and the room fell to silence.

“Its Simon,” Fiona said, “He’s in trouble.”


	20. It All Burns

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone :) Don't worry, all will turn out well in the end. I hope you enjoy this chapter, I wanted to bring in the humdrum at some point and I'm really happy with the result. If you guys like my writing, then you might want to check out my celebrity AU fic called A Carry On Movie. Hope you enjoy this chapter! <3

Simon

He felt numb as he was dragged to the dining hall. He had no idea why the Mage was taking him there instead of the Coven’s official meeting place but he knew whatever the reason, it was to punish him. When he passed by windows he saw that the sky outside was a light lilac, almost early enough for classes to start but not quite. The dining hall would be just opening for students to have breakfast. Simon wondered what exactly the Mage had in mind.

He wondered, but couldn’t ask. The Mage had cast a **silence is golden** on him, leaving Simon forcibly speechless.

With a sigh Simon continued into the dining hall and was rewarded with the curious gaze of the twenty or so students already inside. Simon felt his face heat as the onlookers took in the shackles on his wrists and ankles. He knew he looked like he’d fallen about as low as he could get and that the Mage wanted everyone to know it. Perhaps this had been his aim in gathering the Coven in the dining hall.

The Mage dragged him to the front of the hall and threw him down to his knees. Simon was surprised to notice that there were no Coven members present. This sort of ceremony always required an audience with magician officials, not students.

“Now we wait,” the Mage whispered.

Simon had no idea what he was talking about. The people who had gathered were hastily moving in and out of the dining hall to wake up roommates in order to bring in more people. He knew this would become the hottest gossip of the year so far but he could not figure out what the Mage’s game was. It was true that he liked to have an audience, but there were already more than enough people gathered for that purpose. If it was the Coven they were waiting for after all, then why weren’t they at the usual meeting place? Simon felt his heart pounding harder as he tried to guess at what was going on.

“Ah, now we can begin,” the Mage said, voice dripping with cold excitement.

Baz had stumbled into the hall looking very disheveled. Simon took a sharp breath in but was still unable to make any noise. Baz found Simon’s eyes quickly and when he did, Simon watched his face fall into agony. Simon shot to his legs quickly and was slammed back down by the Mage’s Men, who had just arrived at the same moment as Baz. Simon felt the dizzying pain of a punch to his side and unwillingly went back to his knees. Baz started running towards them.

The hall had gone quiet once the Mage’s Men had entered. The energy in the room had gone from excited to tense with fear. Everyone knew something bad was about to happen, they just weren’t sure what it would be.

The Mage allowed Baz to get close but not close enough to reach out to Simon. Premal restrained Baz a few feet away from Simon.

“What are you doing? He’s the _Mage’s Heir_ , you can’t do this to him,” Baz said.

“I am quite aware of what I can and cannot do. Simon and I have reached an agreement Basilton, I’ve broken no laws,” the Mage said.

“You are a poisonous son of a bitch,” Baz spat.

“And you are an angry child with no power in the situation,” the Mage said, “Simon here is the one who broke laws, not me. He has decided to repent by admitting his crimes. I am trying to help.”

Simon glared at the Mage. This had been his plan all along. Sure he would let Simon clear everyone else. But he had made sure that Baz would witness the whole mess so that he would get angry and intervene. If Baz so much as struggled in Premal’s grip then the Mage would make sure he was imprisoned. Simon couldn’t think of a way out of this, couldn’t think of a way to tell Baz not to do this, that it was a trap.

“If he is admitting to crimes then he has the right to do so in front of the Coven, where are they?” Baz asked.

Simon was surprised to see a flicker of irritation crack through the Mage’s mask of confidence.

“They, unfortunately, could not be reached,” the Mage said.

“Then he should not face trial today,” Baz said.

“While you are correct that a trial requires the presence of the Coven you are incorrect in your assumption that this is a trial.”

“Excuse me?” Baz said.

“Simon already confessed his crimes to me last night. He has willingly decided to voice his crimes today, which does not require a trial,” the Mage said.

Baz turned his panicked gaze to Simon.

“Please don’t do this,” Baz whispered.

Simon felt tears trail down his face.

“I love you,” Baz said, voice breaking.

_I’m doing this because I love you too_ Simon wanted to say.

“I’m warning you Basilton, if you interfere I’ll have to have you arrested,” the Mage said.

Baz clenched his jaw.

“Fine, I can face a trial in front of the Coven.”

The Mage shrugged.

“Sure, but you are accustomed to a very…lavish diet. If you’re arrested you’ll only have access to the very basics of food.”

Simon felt his stomach drop. If Baz were arrested he would have no access to blood. Which meant he would either starve to death or be exposed as a vampire and executed.

“I won’t let you do this,” Baz said.

Simon felt his magic building.

“So you want to be arrested, as I understand it?” the Mage said.

His magic expanded and twitched, whipping around like a caged animal. He was panicking, losing his grip on the control he’d learned while being tortured by Baz’s father. He could feel it leaking and snaking its way through the rest of the room, watched as his peers reacted to it. The Mage glanced at him, his expression a mixture of concern and surprise.

Premal made a move to subdue Baz.

Then the glass on all of the windows shattered.

Baz

Baz had always known Simon was powerful, had even used his magic to do things he’d always thought were impossible. But in that moment he felt Simon’s magic surge around them like the crashing of a tidal wave; violent, unstoppable, and obliterating.

As the windows crashed Baz heard students scream and fall to the floor. Even when the glass had settled they remained crouched on the ground, some of them writing. It was the magic, so intense that it no longer felt pleasant to be around as it might have been when Simon had gone off in the past. This was more then going off, this was Simon unleashed.

Baz and the Mage were the only ones left standing. Baz had a feeling it was because of his ability to use Simon’s magic As for the Mage, he wondered if it was because he was Simon’s father. Simon was glowing, yellow light burning underneath his skin and shining in his eyes in an inhumanly beautiful way. Baz felt a thrill of fear go up his spine. There was no way for him to balance Simon, no way to stop this from happening. He was going to go off as he never had before, and Baz was not sure everyone else would survive it.

Just when he thought everything had gotten as bad as it could get, Baz heard a peal of childish laughter echo through the hall.

He spun around and saw that an eleven-year-old version of Simon had appeared in the doorway of the hall, and was looking directly at him. Baz shook his head in confusion, wondering if the magic was making him hallucinate. But as he noticed the new feeling of dryness that accompanied Simon’s magic, that strange sucking sensation he’d felt a thousand times before, he realized that the figure was in fact real. The Humdrum had come, in the flesh, and was making his way down the aisle of tables towards them.

The Mage was shouting at Simon, trying to get him to stop going off. It wasn’t working and Baz knew it wouldn’t work. Simon would be like this until he no longer felt panicked. Baz felt a sick wave of nausea as he realized that he was responsible for all of this. If he had just stayed quiet then Simon would have never worried about his safety.

The Humdrum stopped in front of him, smiling like a jack-o-lantern.

“You’re my favorite you know,” He said, his voice lilting in the way Simon’s had once.

“Why is that?” Baz whispered.

“Because you make him feel more than any of the rest,” the Humdrum said, “You’ve helped make lot’s and lot’s of holes. But this well, this will be the biggest yet.”

“I don’t understand,” Baz said.

“All that hurt he doesn’t let himself feel, all those thoughts he won’t think, where do you think they _go?_ ” the Humdrum asked.

“But that’s not magic, that’s just…him,” Baz said.

“He’s made of magic though isn’t he?” the Humdrum asked.

Baz shivered at the similarity the Humdrum’s words held to his own thoughts from the night before.

“All that ugliness, all that pain, it has to go somewhere. I’m just the sorry creature that got stuck with it,” He said, anger flickering in his voice.

“So you’re a…shadow?” Baz asked, trying to understand.

“I’m the nothingness he cannot run from. He can avoid me all he likes, but in the end I’ll always come back.”

“That’s why you’re making the holes,” Baz whispered.

“I’m not making them,” the Humdrum said.

He put his palm to Baz’s chest, sending him to his knees. Baz cried out as he felt pain spike through him, a burning sensation that left him desperately thirsty. He needed to get something to drink, he needed _blood_. His body naturally targeted Simon, the biggest and most dangerous predator in the room. Blood and magic, it coursed through him like a never-ending fountain.

“I _am_ the holes,” the Humdrum said.


	21. All Hell Breaks Loose

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is not the last chapter! Please don't hate me for the angst, I promise there's a happy ending waiting at the end of the fan fic rainbow. All will end well. Hope you enjoy <3

Simon

A weight like a speeding car hit him and threw him to the ground. The surprise and confusion of the attack interrupted his magic. In a flash, Simon took in several details at once. The students and the Mage's Men were scrambling, crawling on broken glass just to get out of the dining hall. There were groans and screaming all around him. The Mage was yelling uselessly at a smiling eleven-year-old version of himself, the Humdrum.

His attacker, strong and stealthy as a panther, was crouched over him, pinning him to the ground. Simon could feel hot breath warm his neck and the very slightest pressure of fangs seeking a vein. He needed to fight back but he didn’t _want_ to.

“Baz… _Baz_ ,” Simon gasped.

“I…don’t want this…can’t stop…” Baz whispered.

“Baby please don’t do this,” Simon cried out, not wanting to reach for his sword.

Baz growled and reared his head back. He was fighting whatever the Humdrum had done to him with all he had, but it wasn’t going to be enough. Simon could see it in his grey eyes.

“Take it from me,” Simon murmured.

“Simon…kill me…” Baz grunted.

“Never,” Simon said.

He put his hands on Baz’s neck and kissed him, risking everything in that second. Simon could feel the need coming off of Baz, knew what he was doing would most likely get him killed, but couldn’t find a way to care. Then, once they were skin to skin, Simon pushed his magic out and into Baz, letting it ribbon out of him like a rushing river. Baz gasped wildly and kissed him back, drinking in the magic as if it were blood.

After a moment or so he broke off from the kiss, gasping. His normally grey eyes burned an almost metallic silver and there was a vibrancy to his skin that Simon only ever saw right after he’d had fresh blood. It didn’t make sense, Baz hadn’t bitten him, and yet he looked as if he had downed several deer.

“You saved me,” Baz said.

“Of course I did. And I’d do it again,” Simon said.

Baz smiled.

“I love you Baz,” Simon said.

And then the unthinkable happened.

A blade, one Simon knew quite well, protruded suddenly from Baz’s chest.

Fiona

She was running through hallways she never thought she would see again, desperately trying to get to the Dining Hall before it was too late. Mitali, Penny, and Agatha were there too, running as fast as she was. They could all smell the magic, Simon’s magic, and they knew what it meant. Something horrible had happened.

Fiona could only imagine a few things that would have made Simon go off like that, and all them were making her heart pound faster with fear. She wanted Simon to be okay. But most of all, Fiona was thinking about Baz. The boy who she had raised since he was five years old, a nephew who was more of a son to her. He was supposed to be immortal, that was the one comforting rumor about vampirism that Fiona latched onto at night. But she knew the reality; Nicodemus Petty no longer looked like the eighteen-year-old boy he’d been when he was turned. If vampires could age then they could certainly die.

She had convinced Mr. Wellbelove of the Mage’s criminal charges the night before. She at least had the comfort of knowing he was presenting the evidence they had collected along with Nico’s testimony to the Coven. She was sure the Coven would finally understand the truth and come to arrest David. But she knew they wouldn’t be here yet, that she couldn’t depend on them to save Baz or Simon.

She could only hope that she had gotten there in time, that there was a chance to save both boys.

Simon

Blood immediately soaked Baz’s white shirt. He made a horrible noise, his eyes fluttering in complete shock. Simon felt his heart stop, felt as if everything in the room had gone completely silent. In that moment, Simon’s entire world shattered. Then the Mage’s knife disappeared from his chest and Baz slumped forward.

Simon caught him and cradled him. He was trying to remember healing spells, anything that could stop what was happening. It was impossible, too awful for Simon to accept.

_“Jesus fucking Christ,”_ Simon said.

Baz coughed, blood staining his lips.

“Still swearing like a Normal,” Baz choked out.

“I can fix this,” Simon said.

“There are things…even you…can’t fix,” Baz said.

“ _Shut up!_ You’re not going to die, _I won’t let you die_.”

Simon felt himself hyperventilating.

“I love you Simon,” Baz said.

“ _Don’t._ This isn’t goodbye,” Simon said.

Baz smiled weakly.

“Always…so stubborn. I…I’m sorry…”

Baz’s eyes rolled back in his head and then he was still.

Simon couldn’t tell if he was alive or dead. Did vampires have to breath? Did they have a heart beat? Was it possible Baz had only passed out from the blood loss? Or had his worst fear come to life?

“No,” Simon said.

He could feel his magic surging up in him again.

**“Time heals all wounds,”** Simon said.

Yellow light streamed from his hands and into Baz’s skin. This was something Simon could fix if only he acted fast enough, at least that was what he was trying to convince himself. They had a connection like nobody else had, the ability to share magic; it had to count for something.

Simon was ripped away from Baz and thrown several feet away by the Mage. He slammed down on the ground with a surprising amount of force and felt his magic falter.

“He’s dead Simon, move on.”

_“Move on?”_ Simon said.

The Mage kicked at Baz’s unmoving leg.

“He was attacking you. I was _protecting_ you,” the Mage said.

_“You killed him!”_ Simon shouted.

At that moment the doors to the hall flew opened, revealing Fiona, Mitali, Penny, and Agatha. Fiona took the entire scene in and froze.

“Basilton?” She said.

Simon felt a burst of pain ricochet through him.

“I can save him,” Simon whispered, begging the Mage with his eyes, “Just let me use my magic and I can fix this.”

The Humdrum was watching everything happen with a bored expression on his childish face.

“I can’t let you do that Simon. He’s a threat and a distraction. And it’s time for you to fulfill your duty as the Chosen One and give me your powers so I can stop the Humdrum once and for all.”

Fiona was screaming, fighting to get out of the grip Mitali had around her. Penny and Agatha were taking opposite sides of the room, slowly creeping up towards them.

“I say you kill him,” the Humdrum said, eyes on Simon.

“Simon just come here and we can figure everything else out,” the Mage said.

Simon was shaking, unable to figure out how he could get to Baz.

“He’s taken everyone from you,” the Humdrum said, coming to stand beside Simon.

Simon felt his sword materialize at his side.

“Simon, don’t listen to him! He’s trying to ruin everything!” the Mage shouted.

Simon jerked his head away from the Mage’s direction.

“A father who didn’t want you until he could use you,” the Humdrum whispered.

Agatha was coming up slowly behind Baz, her eyes focused on the wound at his chest.

“Simon stop this nonsense now!” the Mage whispered.

Fiona was on her knees, sobbing into Mitali’s arms.

“He killed Baz’s mother and got a promotion for it,” the Humdrum said, anger coloring his tone.

“Yes,” Simon whispered.

“He killed your mother when he forced her to do the ritual to make you the Chosen One,” the Humdrum said.

“How…?” the Mage said, looking shocked.

Simon felt tears dripping down his face.

“He killed all of them and now he’s killing Baz, will you let him do that to you? Let him take even more from you?” the Humdrum asked.

“No,” Simon said, gripping his sword tighter.

“He’s always talked to you like you were a failure! Like you weren’t the Chosen One he wanted. Let’s show him he was wrong.”

Simon felt his magic building once more and this time he let it. His sword began to glow a bright white, but it didn’t hurt to hold. He would do this, would kill the Mage so he could protect Baz. Going off one more time would be worth it if it meant he could save him.

“Simon, don’t!” Penny yelled.

She was right behind him, a hand on his back as if she could stop him through touch alone.

He knew what his magic could do and suddenly he realized that if he went off in order to stop the Mage then he might hurt everyone else in the room too. He couldn’t let it end like this, couldn’t let himself be manipulated by the Humdrum. He had to attack his father head on.

“Sir, if you love me at all, you’ll get out of the way,” Simon said.

“Simon you know I can’t. I have half a mind to set him on fire right now just to be safe,” the Mage said.

“I’m your son, isn’t that worth anything?” Simon asked.

His magic was calming down and his grip on his sword was steadying.

“Not this,” the Mage said.

“I made a promise to keep him safe. Don’t make me do this,” Simon said.

The Mage shook his head and turned to Baz. Agatha had her wand out and was halfway through a spell when the Mage kicked her in the chest, sending her flying towards the tables.

Simon was already running, knowing what had to be done. It felt strange, he had only known the Mage was his father for a month or so. Now he was about to do the unthinkable in order to save the boy he loved. It felt surreal, as he got closer to his father and part of him wished it didn't have to be this way. But Simon had run out of time and he had to make a decision fast.

His blade sliced through the Mage’s back. Gagging, Simon twisted the blade and yanked downwards, making sure that his father could not recover from the blow. Then he removed the blade, slick with his blood, and tossed it across the room.

His father staggered back, a look of utter betrayal in his eyes. Simon knew what he had just done would haunt him forever. Killing your father, however justified, left a mark on you that could not be overlooked. David fell backwards and crashed to the ground, gasping a bit before going completely still.

“Could have saved the effort and just gone off on him, definitely would have been more helpful for _me_ ,” the Humdrum said.

He had come to squat next to Baz and was stroking him almost lovingly.

“He’s alive you know, but just barely. You’re spell managed to do at least that before daddy dearest went and threw you across the room.”

“If you are what I think you are then you won't hurt him,” Simon whispered, frozen in place.

“And why not? With him you’ll never need me again. I need him to survive, but to grow…I need him to die.”

“Please, he doesn’t deserve this,” Simon said.

“These violent delights have violent ends…or something like that isn’t it? You should’ve known better than to think any of this would end in anything other than tragedy,” the Humdrum said.

The problem was that Simon couldn’t just stab the Humdrum and be done with it. He had realized that in some twisted way, the Humdrum was a part of him, or rather a consequence of him. He had been running from the truth for so long, content in believing the Humdrum was some magical villain that had nothing to do with him. But it was time for him to face it, or else he risked Baz’s and everyone else’s life.

Simon walked slowly over to the Humdrum, feet sticking slightly to the blood soaked floor.

The Humdrum frowned but didn’t move. Simon had the feeling the boy could kill everyone in the entire room with the snap of his fingers if that was what he wanted.

With his eyes locked onto the Humdrum’s, Simon knelt down and put his hand on the boy’s shoulder.

“I’m sorry I ignored you for so long,” Simon said.

"It doesn't matter," the Humdrum said angrily.

"You don't have to pretend anymore," Simon said.

The Humdrum’s face fell.

“It’s okay to stop now. I promise I’ll never run from you again,” Simon said.

The Humdrum’s lip quivered a bit, very much an eleven-year-old thing to do.

“I don’t want to be empty anymore,” the Humdrum whispered.

“I know,” Simon said.

He hugged the Humdrum and let his magic free.

“We’re going to be okay now,” Simon whispered.

The Humdrum was soaking in his magic. It felt liberating in a way, to let go of something so many people told him he needed to protect at all costs. Finally he didn’t feel like he was fighting the inevitable, but instead is if he were finally letting go.

His arms were suddenly empty, the image of the Humdrum’s face fading away. Before it disappeared Simon noticed that there was a small smile on his face.

Even after the Humdrum disappeared however, he felt his magic still sucking away. Something was taking it, something that wasn’t the humdrum. Simon shook his head, trying to gain control of it. He didn’t want to lose it all, to have to say goodbye to a world that he had only just discovered he actually belonged to. He grasped at his chest in a panic, trying to catch the invisible.

Just before he had given up all hope, he felt arms wrap around him. Baz’s arms were holding him, tapping into his magic and stopping the flow of it. With Baz helping suddenly he was able to gain some control. He focused on Baz, letting him tap into his magic fully. Between the two of them, they controlled the magic together.

Simon turned in Baz's arms so that he could face him.

“You’re alive,” Simon gasped.

“Because of you,” Baz said.

The sucking feeling died away.

Simon felt different. He no longer felt the immense weight of his magic. Instead he felt the pleasant buzz of magic zipping through his bones. It felt like when he stayed out a little too long in the sun; a warmth that was almost, but not quite, overwhelming. He realized then that it was what it felt like to have the level of magic he was supposed to have had all along.

“I thought I had lost you,” Simon said.

“I made it my main mission in life to annoy you forever, I wasn't going to let a knife stop me from achieving that goal,” Baz said.

Simon laughed and kissed Baz. Relief sang through him and made him dizzy as he kissed his boyfriend. 

_He's alive._

_We're alive._

Then the rest of the group descended on them, sobbing and hugging them. Fiona was kissing Baz’s face frantically. Penny was crying into Simon’s shoulder while Mitali held her daughter. Agatha was hugging Baz, much to Simon’s surprise. They fell into a group hug and Simon finally felt like he could relax.

It wasn’t over. They still had to deal with the Coven. Simon wasn’t sure if he would be charged because of his unintentional connection to the Humdrum. He wasn’t even sure if they would see his killing the Mage as self-defense or not. But at least he knew that everyone he loved was safe. The rest could wait until the Coven got there.


	22. Coming Down

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry for not updating sooner. July has been a busy month, just had my 21st bday on the 15th and now I have like 6 more family bdays to celebrate lol. This is the second to last chapter so I hope you enjoy it <3 
> 
> P.S. Sir Bleakly is not a character I came up with, I found him when I was rereading Fangirl recently lol.

Baz

The Mage’s office seemed eerier than it had the last time Baz had been inside of it. It had now become the office to two murdered headmasters, in a _row._ Baz wondered if it was the start of a curse and shuddered at the thought. The Mage was dead, the Humdrum had been taken care of, and everyone he cared about was alive. He’d need to keep his mind away from things like murder and curses for a while if he wanted to focus on the positives.

The Coven stood around the Mage’s desk, staring at them with perplexed expressions. They had clearly never expected to find Simon Snow and Baz Pitch fighting side by side, especially not while holding hands. Simon had refused to be separated from Baz and it didn’t matter anyways, they all had to be questioned. Mitali Bunce stood with her arm wrapped firmly around both Penny and Agatha, her eyes daring anyone to mess with her. Fiona stood back in the corner of the room, hunched angrily in the darkness.

“You’ll be glad to know that we found David guilty, Simon,” Dr. Wellbelove said.

“And that means?” Simon said dully.

Dr. Wellbelove smiled in spite of himself but cleared his throat when the other Coven members gave him a disapproving glance.

“It means…we believe you acted in self defense. I checked Basilton’s chest. Although healed, the blood on his shirt and the scar do not lie.”

Sir Bleakly, another Coven member, shifted forward.

“How did he heal so quickly? It seems suspicious,” He said.

Simon took in a sharp breath.

Baz understood his reaction. When Dr. Wellbelove was looking at him both he and Simon had noticed the doctor’s eyes widen when he saw the wound. Even if Simon’s magic had healed him, his skin shouldn’t have regenerated that quickly. Only a few species had the capability, vampires being one of them. If he decided to share his discovery, Baz would probably be executed on the spot.

“Simon’s magic has amazing properties. He had an incredible surge when he saw Baz stabbed. I imagine he healed him through sheer force of will,” Dr. Wellbelove said.

Baz sagged forward a bit in relief.

“Hmph,” Sir Bleakly replied, obviously disappointed.

“So Simon Snow and Baz Pitch are cleared for the murder of the former Mage,” Dr. Wellbelove said.

“And that means he’s no longer the Mage’s Heir, does he still have a place in the World of Mages?” a Coven member Baz didn’t recognize asked.

Fiona stepped forward, her tan face flushed crimson.

“As you established during last nights proceedings, Simon is the biological child of the deceased and Lucy Salisbury. He is a Mage and he belongs with us,” She said.

“He’s the Humdrum! This is preposterous; he should be taken away immediately. Maybe even executed,” Sir Bleakly puffed.

Simon grimaced.

“Stop talking,” Baz said.

“No, it’s fine,” Simon said, eyes on Baz.

“Why don’t we let Simon explain first,” Dr. Wellbelove said.

Simon sighed.

“Look…It wasn’t me and it was. I didn’t have any control over him. He acted alone and I seriously have been trying to destroy him. I didn’t even know he was a part of me until today. But he is. I couldn’t control him but the only way to stop him was to accept that he was a part of the things I was repressing for a long time.”

Sir Bleakly harrumphed.

“So it _is_ your fault?” He asked.

“Yes,” Simon said, misery in his eyes.

Mitali stepped forward.

“Excuse me, but my husband has been working on tracking the Humdrum for a long time now. I think my expertise is useful here.”

Dr. Wellbelove nodded gratefully.

“Simon’s friends have all testified to his dedication in hunting the Humdrum. I believe he’s being honest. However, if you need to there are plenty of truth spells you could use to make sure.”

“I think we trust his side of things,” Dr. Wellbelove said, “He was right about David.”

“That doesn’t mean he isn't responsible, even if it was _indirectly_ ,” Sir Bleakly said.

Simon shook his head minutely.

Baz felt like yelling at all of them or maybe setting a fire and sneaking Simon away into the Wavering Wood. But it wouldn’t be enough for Simon, he didn’t need Baz defending him and he definitely wouldn't want to run away. Simon was the kind of person who jumped into the mess, not the kind that looked the other way.

“Look if you want me to take the wrap for this then I will. I just…I want to know that everyone else will be cleared. Penelope, Agatha….Baz, they had nothing to do with this,” Simon said.

Baz laughed.

“So we live through the impossible, and I mean the _impossible_ , and the guy who saved the World of Mages from both the Mage _and_ the Humdrum is going to take the fall?”

Baz knew his voice sounded unhinged, but he couldn’t help it, it was just all too much.

Dr. Wellbelove frowned.

“I suppose…we take a vote,” He said.

“All those in favor of Simon’s imprisonment,” Sir Bleakly said, a smirk on his face.

Baz was excited when he noticed only three of the Coven members raised their hands.

“All in favor of exonerating him of all crimes,” Dr. Wellbelove said, smiling at Simon.

The remaining Coven members raised their hands, making the majority.

“Then it's settled. Simon you and your friends are free to go,” Dr. Wellbelove said.

As they made for the door Dr. Wellbelove patted his daughter lightly. Then he grabbed Mitali gently, a question in his eyes.

“Can you stay behind for a moment? We want to discuss an opportunity with you.”

Baz looked at Penelope questioningly and she shrugged in response. Clearly she had no clue what they wanted with her mother anymore than Baz did. But she didn’t seem overly concerned, so Baz figured she wasn’t in danger.

Simon nudged his hand gently.

Baz turned to face him, expecting to see him cheery about their narrow escape from incarceration only to find his boyfriend’s face was wet with tears. Baz frowned and wiped them away, pulling him closer.

“What’s wrong?” Baz whispered.

“I’m just...” Simon trailed off.

“Simon we’re alive and we’re free, why are you upset?”

Simon’s eyelids fluttered, like he was trying to force the tears out as quickly as possible so as to get the crying over with.

“I know and I _am_ happy. But I’m also…my parents are dead. I killed them both.”

Baz stared at him, not knowing what to say.

“Simon it’s not like that. You were a baby when Lucy died, it wasn’t your fault. And with your dad, he was trying to kill us. He didn’t give you a choice,” Baz said.

“I could have tried to stop him some other way,” Simon said.

“He wouldn't have stopped Simon, no matter what,” Baz said.

Simon nodded. But Baz could tell he wasn’t convinced. He gently pushed his fingers into Simon’s curls, looking him in the eyes. Simon’s blue eyes tried to avoid him but Baz was in his space, making sure he wouldn’t be ignored.

“You saved the day. You saved _my life_.”

Simon’s lip quivered slightly.

“I’m a murderer,” Simon said.

“You’re a hero,” Baz said.

Simon rolled his eyes, a signature _Baz is pissing me off_ move. Baz didn’t even mind, he was just glad that Simon was coming back to him. He kissed him, being careful not to be overly insistent. Simon kissed him back gently, as if he was unsure it was safe to do so. Then, when Baz rubbed his hands down Simon’s back, Simon relaxed completely into the kiss. Baz could feel all the pain, the relief, and the surrender in that moment.

Simon was finally letting go.


	23. One Last Dance

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel so torn right now; on the one hand I am so happy to give Simon and Baz a happy ending and on the other hand I am so sad the story is over. Thank you to everyone who has stayed with As I Burn through all of my procrastination, cliffhangers, and clunky grammar errors. I absolutely loved writing this fic, and all of the readers have made it that much more enjoyable. I hope you enjoy this last chapter and if you like my writing, then I would be honored if you kept up with my other fics <3 <3 <3

Simon

Simon fidgeted nervously by the punch bowl, trying to ignore the hundreds of eyes on him. He had been to classes since the Mage’s death, but he had mostly kept to himself and his friends. Now that it was the Leaver’s Ball he was out in the open, exposed to all of his peers. Some looked only curious, like they wanted to find out how much magic he had _really_ lost. Others looked awed, like he really was the hero Baz had said he was. But there were others, those who didn’t believe that the Mage had done what they’d said he did and those who felt Simon and the Humdrum were one in the same; these people were glaring at Simon.

There was also, of course, the added surprise of he and Baz dating. Even with all of the more fantastic gossip circling him. Baz was running late, he had wanted to see Fiona sworn into the Coven. Simon was happy for her, even if he didn’t agree with all of her politics. She had come a long way since she had first saved him from Malcolm and Simon hoped that she would help to balance the rest of the Coven out.

Penny approached with Agatha at her side, their dresses completely at odds with one another and yet somehow perfectly cohesive. Their arms were linked, which struck Simon as somewhat odd. Agatha and Penny weren’t very physically affectionate with their friends. Simon wondered if something had happened that he had missed.

“When is Baz getting here?” Penny asked, her purple hair bouncing.

“I’m not sure. The Coven meetings tend to go late.”

Agatha grinned.

“Tonight is going to be so much fun! Let’s go up to your room later for one last time.”

Simon smiled but felt a bit sad. It really was all for one last time. They had made it, finished their time at Watford. Now it was time for them to move on with their lives and see where it took them. Simon knew he wouldn’t be giving that much up, the four of them had decided to get a flat together after all, but it was still sad. They would never walk the halls at Watford as students again, would never have dangerous adventures on the school grounds again, and they would never be as innocent as they had once been before.

“I just can’t believe it’s over,” Simon said.

“It’s not really, my mom is the new headmaster. We’re going to be here all the time,” Penny said.

“Well, _you’ll_ be here all the time. _I’m_ going to be too busy at my Normal school and at my Normal job,” Agatha said.

“Starbucks isn’t a Normal job Agatha, it’s a clichéd job. They’ll sniff you out as a Mage right away, definitely trying too hard to be a real Normal,” Penny said, poking her finger at Agatha’s nose affectionately.

Simon blinked in confusion.

“Am I missing something here?” He asked.

Agatha rolled her eyes.

“I was originally planning on moving out to California.”

“But I convinced her that there was plenty of non-magical things to do right at home and that we were much better than any palm trees ever would be," Penny said.

Agatha frowned.

“They don’t have palm trees everywhere in California.”

“They so do,” Penny said, “But that’s not the point. In the end I convinced her but now she’s insisting on doing everything as Normal as possible.”

Simon laughed.

“While I appreciate the explanation, that’s not what I meant. You two are acting very…close?” Simon said.

They looked at each other and blushed deeply.

“Oh god, we’ll be living in a house of couples,” Simon said, finally catching on.

At that moment Baz walked into the room. He was wearing a deep green suit and a black dress shirt with a black tie. It was a lovely look on him, highlighting the grey in his eyes and his inkwell black hair. Simon felt his heart beat faster and wondered not for the first time how things had ever worked out this well for him. Simon had been in love with Baz for years, a love that he had always thought was both doomed and unrequited. But here he was, standing in the middle of a ball waiting to dance with the boy he loved, and everything had worked out in the end.

“Penny? I’ll be right back, I just want to talk to Baz really quickly,” Agatha said.

Simon glanced at her questioningly.

“Don’t worry Simon, I’ll play nice,” She said, smiling at him.

Baz

The room was a flurry of magic, filled with floating lights and pretty starbursts suspended in motion. Baz knew that the Leaver’s Ball was meant to be amazing, but he hadn’t realized it would feel like this, as if the world was paused in the middle of a dream, one that he knew he had to wake up from eventually but didn’t ever want to forget.

He could see Simon, nervously waiting for him across the room in a grey suit that he was pretty sure Dr. Wellbelove had given him a few years ago. But it still looked amazing on him, and Baz had eyes for no one else. Simon’s blue eyes shown even from across the room, sucking Baz’s attention as they always had.

Before he could walk over to him however, Agatha Wellbelove crowded his vision.

She was in a long white gown with gold embellishments stitched carefully into the delicate silk fabric. Her blonde hair was done simply, falling sleek and straight down her back and shoulders. She looked as if she belonged here, in this night of lights and magic, but Baz knew the truth. She couldn’t wait to be free of all of it.

“Basilton,” Agatha said, smiling shyly.

“Why if it isn’t Watford’s angel in the flesh. What can I do for you?” Baz asked.

She looked away.

“I know it’s been a few weeks since everything…happened, but I wanted to talk to you properly, to apologize for my behavior.”

Baz frowned.

“What are you talking about?” He asked.

She sighed, squaring her shoulders like she was preparing to do something truly unpleasant.

“When I first found out that Simon had feelings for you it drove me mad. It wasn’t that I wanted Simon to stay with me; it was that you of all people were the one to make him walk away. I thought you would break him, with all your charm and your arrogance. But you didn’t, and I was wrong. And I want you to know that I don’t dislike you anymore. In fact, I care about you very much.”

Baz’s mouth had hung open somewhere in the middle of her speech in disbelief. He tried to close it and respond to her.

“I know you care Agatha, I remember you trying to heal me before the Mage threw you off of me.”

She smiled.

“And I’m sorry too. I could have handled things a lot better from the start. It’s amazing that you never had me killed when this whole thing started,” Baz said.

She hugged him.

“I can’t wait for us all to live together,” She whispered.

“Now,” Baz said when they detached from one another, “Let’s get this party started, yes?”

They strolled over to Penny and Simon, who both looked incredibly happy and a little bit surprised.

“Did you two kiss and make up?” Penny asked, slinging an arm around Agatha’s delicate waist.

“Of course, we’re both classically beautiful and far more charming than the both of you. In fact, I think we’ll make the best of friends,” Baz said.

Penny laughed.

“Fine, I’ll accept that statement solely on its cuteness alone. C’mon Agatha, let’s dance.”

The two of them walked away from them, glittering on the dance floor.

Simon turned to face Baz. His blue eyes were alive with happiness and nostalgia; alight in a way they hadn’t been since the Mage’s death. Baz wasn’t stupid, he knew Simon wasn’t over everything, that he might never be over it, but it was nice to see that he could still live through it, that it couldn’t take away his spirit. Simon lifted his hands to run them gently through Baz’s hair.

“You’re going to mess it up,” Baz mumbled.

“I like it all messed up. It drives me nuts when you gel it like this,” Simon said.

“I’m trying to look presentable,” Baz said.

“You’re trying,” Simon said, stepping closer to him, “To look like Bela Lugosi.”

Baz laughed and bumped his forehead against Simon.

“Sharing a room with you, I wonder how we’ll manage,” Baz said.

“Like we always do,” Simon said, “Horribly.”

Baz closed his eyes and smiled. This was how it was supposed to be between the two of them. Joking and snuggling on a magically lit dance floor, surrounded by their friends. He knew there were other things out there; people who hated them for what they had done, jobs they would need to find, and new difficulties they would never see coming. But he also knew that they could handle it together, that nothing could ever split them apart.

“I love you Simon Snow,” Baz said.

“I love you too Baz, always have and I always will,” Simon said.

Baz kissed him, not caring about their audience. Simon kissed him back, murmuring happily into his mouth.

Things would never be the same but Baz realized he didn’t want them to be. He liked his new life and he wouldn’t trade it for anything else.

It was time for them to face the future and carry on, together.

**Author's Note:**

> This is a redo of a one shot I posted on my tumblr fanfic account for the Carry On Countdown. If you'd like to read it you can go to carry-on-kissing-snowbaz.tumblr.com and look at the page My Fanfiction. I decided to edit the one shot and make it into a chaptered fic here.


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